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Alicia_MSW, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 794
Experience:  Specializing in relationship/family counseling
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I just discovered I like men. Is this normal? (Im a married

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I just discovered I like men. Is this normal? (I'm a married man...)
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Alicia_MSW replied 5 years ago.
Hi, I'm Alicia. Thanks for asking your question - I'm happy to try to help.
Sometimes, it can take a while before people realize their true sexual orientation. It's possible that you're bisexual (although there's a study about that that you might be interested in reading: if you still feel attracted to your wife, or to women in general.
But it can be normal if you've suppressed certain feelings throughout your life. Maybe they are just coming to light now due to circumstances, I can't say for sure because I don't know what is going on in your life, but perhaps you've met a man you feel close to, for example. Some people believe that love and attraction are not about the sex of the person (man or woman) but are about the actual person - who they are, how they make you feel, how comfortable you feel around them, etc.
I realize that, since you're married, it's a bit of a difficult situation. I don't know how you plan to go about addressing this with your wife, or if you even want to. But you might think about talking about some of your feelings with a sex therapist or a psychotherapist. It's not to say that there is anything wrong with how you are feeling, but if it's causing you distress or anxiety, then it can be helpful to talk about it. You might also be interested in reading some of the information from the American Institute of Bisexuality (I realize you are in Romania, but you might still find the information useful: Best wishes, and please let me know if you need further assistance.
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