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Ask-Rivka, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 57
Experience:  Licensed Social Worker
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When is it "appropriate" to have "the talk" about where our

Resolved Question:

When is it "appropriate" to have "the talk" about where our relationship is heading and if we are going to be exclusive? It seems like he is ready i'm just worried he is taking advantage of the "i'll-just-wait-until-something-better-comes-along" thing. Even though that is not like him at all. I am recently divorced and have some trust issues...
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ask-Rivka replied 5 years ago.
Hi- there's no right time to have that talk. For some couples it's a few dates, others a few weeks, others a few months, and still others take years. It really depends. I'd say that it sounds more like some insecurities on your side rather than what is possibly going on. You stated that you're recently divorced, so it's very likely that you have not worked past all the issues of your marriage, divorce, break up, etc. You stated that you have trust issues, so it's no wonder that you are having doubts that he sincerely XXXXX XXXXX be with you. I would take a little time to work out your feelings and gain your confidence back up again. I would recommend working with a weekly therapist until you feel that these things have been really worked on. It will significantly improve the relationship you are in now and will help you for many years to come. (you don't have to stop seeing him to go to therapy). You can find a therapist by contacting your health insurance provider and finding one in your network. Or you can find one at

I hope I have provided you with the encouragement and referrals needed for you to gain more confidence and resolve issues from your past relationship. Good luck to you. If I have answered your question, please accept my answer by clicking on the green accept answer button. If not, please let me know what more I could help you with.
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