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Ask-Rivka, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 57
Experience:  Licensed Social Worker
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its been 4months since my husband left i recently found out

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its been 4months since my husband left i recently found out he was with someone else i cant seem to get past this.he still comes down but everything he has to tell me is through texting not too my face.i still miss him,icry all the time and cant get passed this
Hi there- I'm so terribly sorry to hear about your husband! What a tragic situation! Any break up is heart-breaking, but particularly a marriage. It's no wonder that you haven't been able to "get past this" because you guys don't seem to have closure on your relationship at all. Texting is a TERRIBLE form of communication when discussing relationships (it's really only good for quick things). I know you said that you went to see a counselor, but I'm wondering how long you went-- was it one session? was it one year? I'm wondering whether it was helpful? If it wasn't helpful, I'd recommend seeing another one. Sometimes two people just don't have great chemistry and you definitely need to feel comfortable and click with your therapist.

I would recommend seeing a therapist regularly so that you can begin to work on the issues you have with this break up and help you with your feelings of loss and sadness. I would also encourage you to try to set up a time to speak to him face to face or on the phone about your marriage. You guys need to discuss the divorce, etc as well. You deserve answers and closure.

You can find a therapist by contacting your health insurance provider to find one in your network. You can also go to

I hope I have provided you with the encouragement and the referrals you needed to seek further help. You are not alone. A mental health provider will help you through this situation. Good luck to you.
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