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I guess the botXXXXX XXXXXne with you is that we need to see a professional. I metioned about quiting my job but that is really not an option for me at 44 years of age. would not feel fair to myself with the commentments I have made to banks and myself. Your answer of makeing her feel more secure is very general. I am a guy and need specifics. This is not the only person I get hateful remarks about when they are clode or around. I ask everyone I know to try to validate to myself that I am not that type of person and in fact the answer I always get back is that I am not now or never was that type of person in fact I have been criticizsed for the drastic change I have made. recently I have had the feelings that this is something we will never overcome and what is the use of dragging ourselvs through the agony.