How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask TherapistJen Your Own Question
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3527
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
TherapistJen is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

ive been with my boyfriend 5 years. threw the years ive given

Resolved Question:

i've been with my boyfriend 5 years. threw the years i've given alot of money. he does pay back most of the time though. now im really getting tired of him and this whole relationship for various reasons. he snorts heroin, i''ve been told hes gay. he denies the gay but i do know he snorts heroin. but my question is at the end of the month he will be coming into maybe 30,000 dollars. i dont know if i can hang in here that long but i want to to get some of the money some owed and some just because i deserve it. should i try to hang in there or get out now or just say we should break for a while. im by no means money hungry i have my own but i dont want to feel as tho ive been used
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 5 years ago.
If you believe that hanging in a bit longer guarantees that you will recoup the money you loaned him and it is important for you to get that money back then hanging in seems like the way to go.
But if his drug habit and poor relationship with you is too draining and destructive to you then you need to weight that cost with the cost of losing the money. Either way it will be tough, but your mental health may be worth the price.
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Thats a good answer! i really do believe if i hang in there he will give me money and the only reason i may hang in there is because i dont want to face the fact in the future that i lost some money because of him and feel used nor do i want to hang in there for the money and feel like a user. but you are so right about this being draining and detructive and when i weigh it the draining and destructive aspect outweighs the money. and i forgot to mention i do love. hanging in there withhim another 3 weeks seem like another year. so in your heart u think i should run dont you?
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 5 years ago.
I know you want me to give you that answer, but i wouldn't be helping you, I promise. It is your history and your space. But, what I can and will do is support you in whatever decision you make. I also can point out th the options as I have and maybe a bit clearly for you because as the one in it, it can be so tough to see it!
TherapistJen and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you