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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6893
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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hi, how can i possibly get my partner not to be envious of

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hi, how can i possibly get my partner not to be envious of my daughter, and understand that the relationship that i have with her mother is purely dealing with that fact. we split when my daughter was 3 and i began the relationship over a year later. we've been together nearly 4 years. we've had numurous problems in the past but there seems to be no let up and ive just about had enough?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 5 years ago.

It seems like you are in the middle. It is difficult but possible. You have to include both of them in activities together as well as individually. There should be couple time and child/parent time. One should not overshadow the other. Give your partner time for romance so that you can be a couple without being a parent. She will appreciate a candlelight dinner without no talk of children. Then she may not feel as pressed when your attention is on your daughter. Have firm boundaries in your home so she sees that you can set limits that respect her feelings. Always take her views into account even if you don't agree with them. Give her reassuring words when you think she needs her opinion valued. Don't act as if your word is final but use a process based more on a consensus when you can.


Your partner wants to feel heard. That goes a long way. She always wants her time. Sometimes you have to be a partner over a parent. There are times for everything. Nurture the relationship routinely. Try to listen to her complaints and work on compromises.


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