Hi, I think not. You see when we really love someone we trust them. If they tell us they are working long hours and are too tired to make love we come up with other times, we alter our schedules, we "find" a way to inject some romance before we search others laptops.
Checking on you to see if you were seeing someone else or engaging in porn online is not an indicator of love but rather an indicator of distrust which is at the foundation of mature love.
I so wish you two had been better able to communicate so that you might have avoided the trap that many couples fall into....the no time to romance trap. I tell my couples who see me in the office that they must make time, one night per week, and that must be date night. This is not entirely about sex, its about reconnecting and spending time together without the kids, the work problems, the economy problems and all of that. It is the time that I believe couples should set aside N.M.W. (no matter what) to remind one another of those first few sparks and why they came together.
All the couples protest that they are too tired or too busy to do this one thing. I know that they must do this in order to rekindle and amidst much protest when the couples finally do follow this recommendation they are delighted to see how this one small change makes such a huge difference in all other aspects (this is called transfer benefits) of their relationship.
In your case I think some re altering of schedules might have happened with greater ease than you might have thought at the time. I have never met a couple that could not schedule a two hour "date" even if one was working third shift and the other second and both sharing the raising of the couples six kids. It can be done.
I think your deeper question is did she love you? Yes I think she did "love" you in the sense that she had strong affectionate feelings for you. I think her version of love was fulfilled but it seems a more shallow version than what most people experience. Love is much more than head over heels infatuation, much much more than the fancy wedding day (and as I recall from my own one of the most stressful days ever). Love is what gets you through the tough times, the lost job moments when you wonder how you will make the car payment together, the sick child you are holding together in the emergency room, the cancer scares, the deaths of your parents. Love is what sustains you in the most mundane and painful and messy situations of your marriage and what keeps you together when the romance wanes and the sex is not quite as sparkly as it was the first time. I think she loved you in her way, I am just very sure you are looking for, and deserve a higher love than that which she was capable of giving you :)