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Ask Dr. Shirley Schaye Your Own Question
Dr. Shirley Schaye
Dr. Shirley Schaye, Doctor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1673
Experience:  PhD-Psych; Certif. Psychoanalyst NPAP& NYFS; Memb.APsaA;IPA; Pub.Author; Teach/Supervise Therapy
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ok, been dating this great guy, things seemed to be going great

Resolved Question:

ok, been dating this great guy, things seemed to be going great - met his kids, met his best friends, most of them from childhood and work - he invited me to his place - hopes were up
but something seemed off - don't know it ifs my paranoia from past relationships or if it is
something - he calls when he says he will, he did however quit texting the am good
morning message - and the biggest thing for me is he is taking it very slow - which I am
fine with and actually happy - no sex yet - lots of kissing and holding but no sex - he says
wants to be friends first - however he did invite me to meet his family - on the down side
i have a brother with the same first name as him - most of my family is gone and my brother
and I are quite close - I called who I though was my brother all excited telling him about this
great guy I met and that he invited me to meet his family - and then silence - all of a sudden
i realized it was the guy I was dating i called who has the same name as my brother - we
talked about it and he called me 3 times last night afterwards - i of course and mortified and
don't know what to do - he said that were fine and he was actually flattered but then
he thru out the just friends thing first - so confused here - i am totally open and naked to
him now and not sure how to move past this - any advise
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Shirley Schaye replied 6 years ago.

Dr. Shirley Schaye :

Thank you for contacting Just Answer. Don't fret! So he knows you think he is a great guy. Think about it this way. You could have said some nasty things about him --- like, oh, he's a nice guy but know he's not for me but what the heck better to date him than have no guy around. Clearly don't take what I am saying seriously.( And by the way, I would never in my life suggest something like that --- certainly better not to date than be with someone you don't want to be with.)I am merely putting things in perspective. Yeah, I could see you feel embarrassed but you said nice things about him. Take things slowly. He is being careful. Try to go with the flow.

Dr. Shirley Schaye :

OOPS!!! but no, not know

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