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Doctor Kevin
Doctor Kevin, Ph.D.
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1482
Experience:  24 years in a private practice
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HI, I am a 41 year old attractive female. I have been with

Customer Question

HI, I am a 41 year old attractive female. I have been with my 59 year old boyfriend for 2 almost 3 years. We have been living together, At first he was so willing and ready to be with me and marry me, so we moved in together. Since then, I have found out he still talks and communicates with his ex wife. I just found out she lives across the street from him.. Wow. I did not know this for 2 years. He says they r just friends, however, she wont talk to me if she sees me out. I have called her to try and be her friend, so we could all try to be friends. But she will not respond. He has tol;d me many times they are just friends, I am ok with that if I could talk to her,or know why and when they talk. He says he cant tell me when they talk because I get upset.. Well, yes, because I dont know what and why they are talking. I just moved out 2 weeks ago. I still dont trust him, but love him. How can I get answers?? He is vey controlling and verbally abusive.  I just need the words and the correct way to make him understand that their relationship is not and has never been respectful of me and my feelings..La
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Doctor Kevin replied 6 years ago.

Kevin Kappler :

You initially trusted him and he betrayed your trust. He would not listen to your attempts at setting limits and now he has to pay the price. You have done the correct thing but this does not get you what you wanted which is an explanation. He is a very controlling man and you can see that he remains in control because he will not offer an explanation for his betrayal. You need to give up trying and let him go. You will be better off in the long run.