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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6893
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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My husband is going away on a business trip. I was supposed

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My husband is going away on a business trip. I was supposed to go with him when he changed his mind last minute. I have a feeling he is keeping something from me. He also extended his trip and now I am getting really nervous of his intentions going there for longer than anticipated. I am scared and I can't stop thinking about all the possible negative scenarios.
First ask you husband all about the trip. Sometimes we create scenarios in our mind and there really are logical explanations. Slow down and approach him about the trip to see if he can give you any clarity. There is always the private investigator in all of us but that could really blow up in your face. Use the positive relationship between you two dispel some of your fears. You also need to ask yourself why the insecurity is occurring now. Is it something he can help fix. For instance, maybe he isn't as romantic as he used to be. Use the opportunity when he comes back to address any sexual, emotional or other insecurities so when he goes away you have peace of mind. Also ask him if you think he is fooling around and see what you get
Customer: replied 6 years ago.

What if he is fooling around? What do I do then?
If he fooling around you look at the choices that people face in this situation - finding a counselor, communicate the expectations between him and you (ending the relationship, ending the affair), decide where you want to go from there (separation), work on the relationship to get past the affair). It boils down to what you want, what he want and what you want as a couple. There have been an endless amount of couples that work past an affair. It depends on your and your husbands desire and a mutual decision. Delaying the actual knowledge will only prolong the period where you and he can sit down and talk about it.
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