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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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I am 21 years old and have been with my boyfriend for 2 months

Resolved Question:

I am 21 years old and have been with my boyfriend for 2 months and because I am a virgin I found it a bit uncomfortable when he gave me oral sex and when we tried to actually have intercourse it was very painful for me! Please tell me is this normal? because my boyfriend seems to think it isn't normal and that I should seek help. Please help me .......
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 6 years ago.



Yes, it is normal. Your hymen may not break all the way through during the first or follow up vaginal intercourse. Hence, the pain you're reporting. If you're nervous and tense up, it may make you lock in your legs as to where penetration may feel more uncomfortable for him but it would still occur.


If you feel comfortable seeing your OBGYN, they can tell you if there is still some of your hymen attached.


As you continue to have vaginal intercourse, this pain will go away. You may take a pain pill before your next intimate encounter but this is normal pain that won't persist. Try to be relaxed as much as possible both emotionally and physically. Maybe having a warm bath before that would help with muscle tension.

Customer: replied 6 years ago.

I have tried to have sex before when I was 18 and I found it painful then too! I just keep thinking that because that image is still in my head and knowing how painful it was then it might be stopping me from having sex again and this scares me it makes me feel like I will never be able to do it

Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 6 years ago.
If your hymen is broken, the other reason for pain can be of psychological nature. It may be either Vaginismus or


in which case you can seek cognitive behavioral therapy and or hypnotherapy to address the pain and its causes.
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