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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6893
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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So a girl (23) that ive (40) recently started hanging out with

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So a girl (23) that ive (40) recently started hanging out with and talking to on a daily basis met a man (55) thru her work as a customer that tipped well. She's known the man longer than me. Her sister (26) has known the man longer thru work and started taking money from the man just for extra money. They both take money. The money isnt a tip for serving him his food. Its just given to them from time to time. He also takes them shopping. He asks nothing in return from them except for their friendship. Now he has asked the 23 year to go along with him to a dinner party and she went as his friend. Now did she go, because she felt she had to, because he gives her money or did she actually go because she wanted to. If he offers money and they dont want to take it he gets upset, mad and acts like they are insulting him when they dont accept the money. They hangout, talk and text him on a daily basis. My guess is that an actual friendship has occured because of him giving them money and hanging out over time. He drives them around when they want to go out and drink to have a DD. I have a problem with the entire situation and wont commit to dating her exclusively with the situation the way it is. My outlook on the situation is they wouldnt even be friends with him if he didnt give them money in the 1st place. My question is should i have a problem with this situation? I think the entire situation is creepy and just plain wrong on many different levels on both sides of the situation.
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  psychlady replied 6 years ago.

You won't believe this but I see met with weird sexual problems for a living. A guy who gives women money on a regular basis always has strings attached (no matter what he says). That is a favorite ploy to make the woman believe that he's doing it out of the goodness of his heart. That's never the case! There may be a friendship (on their part) and he has developed and maintained this facade over a period of time. Eventually there is a cost! When it finally happens she will be very surprised and feel very silly. This is called the grooming process. At the end of the process there is always an emotional or sexual payoff. I would strongly encourage her to end this asap. He is just baiting her but of course he won't tell her that. As far as your relationship, I would encourage her to end this immediately because eventually it will be sexual. Nothing in life is free and this includes his money. He is buying her affections and will attest to how his intentions are honorable. No they are not.


Encourage your girlfriend to refrain participating in this situation. Find anoher way to make ends meet because eventually he will want her to pay up. Guys that give out money to younger women for no reason are not their friend.

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