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Jennifer, School Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 397
Experience:  Extensive experience fostering family relationships through consultation / counseling.
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i am dating some one who is perfect but i must end it because

Customer Question

i am dating some one who is perfect but i must end it because its causing grief to my family because i come from a christian family and he is muslim, i cant bear to see my family upset nor can i bear to see him upset. i have thought about it and i will find it hard to leave my family for him because they are what keep me sane... but he is perfect but i would still choose my family first... it hurts to see that they are hurting. How do i go about this?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Jennifer replied 6 years ago.

Jennifer :

Hello and thanks for using! I'm sorry to hear you're going through this. I think it's safe to say that even if you think this person is perfect, the relationship is obviously not since it's causing you to feel so torn. Help me to understand -- Staying together would require leaving your family? That does seem like a tremendous sacrifice for any relationship (particularly if you're close to your family). When you ask "How do I go about this?" are you asking how to end the relationship or how to cope? I'd be happy to help once I have more information...

JACUSTOMER-2s81z9bd- :

Hi Jennifer thank you so much for your time

JACUSTOMER-2s81z9bd- :

its hard to admit but i need help to end the relationship,

Jennifer and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 6 years ago.

Hi Jennifer thank you so much for your time

its hard to admit but i need help to end the relationship

Expert:  Jennifer replied 6 years ago.
Sounds like you've already considered the alternatives. I'd suggest you have the conversation in person. You could begin with everything that you love about him and the relationship then simply tell him that you wish it were enough. Explain how important your family is to you and that in this case you don't see how you could have a future together. Tell him you truly find him to be an amazing person -- "perfect" as you called it. You just wish the relationship could be as perfect. If it were, you wouldn't feel the strain you're feeling and you'd be able to find a way to make this work. Be open to listening to his point of view -- He may, in fact, have some ideas that you haven't considered. At the end of the day, though, trust your instinct. If ending things still feels like the right thing to do then it probably is just that.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.

thanks so much jennifer ill give it a go, i guess once in doubt theres no turning back...

thank you so much

Expert:  Jennifer replied 6 years ago.
You're very welcome. Hang in there!