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psychlady, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 6893
Experience:  I have over 16 years experience in treating adults presenting with a variety of relationship issues
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I think I have fallen out of love with my husband. I find that

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I think I have fallen out of love with my husband. I find that I hate for him to touch me, and even cringe when waking up next to him. I don't even like him. I want to fix this. We have been together for 8 years and married for 5. we have four kids. I am in collage full time and he is layed off in the winter. Should I tell him how I am feeling?
This is unfortunate but sometimes people just grow apart. This happens a lot when people take different paths like college. If you truly have stopped loving him, then the only fair thing to do is to tell him. I would minimize the effect a little bit by just setting down some ways to do so. Find a quiet time where the two of you are alone. Tell him without any blaming. Don't point a finger such as I don't love you because you are mean. Don't give any reason just tell in a calm voice. Figure out beforehand the compromise you are willing to make. For instance with living situation etc. Most of all assure him that you feel bad but feels this is no one's fault
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Is there no way to fall back in love? I don't believe in devorce and I truly want to love my husband again. I fear that telling him will mean that we have to end it. On the otherhand the confusion and hurt he clearly feels when I can't kiss him with passion makes me feel so guilty.
There is always a chance to fall back in love. But it takes total commitment on your part. You and your husband can schedule date nights and other ways to find alone time. I was just concerned that you feel so definate about how you feels. You are right telling him will make your feelings permanent. Not believing in divorce makes it even more important to try to find ways to be a couple. Schedule date night, make time alone for each other etc. Try to make time for the little things that make each other be in love.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
He sees no point in date- like activities. He is very comfortable with our rut and is a bit of a homebody. How can I express how important this is without upsetting the applecart?
You need to let him know that all couples can benefit from these activities. The point is to get out of a rut and let him know gently that you feel you need to do this as well. Can he do this for you. Just use them as a tool and convince him this is necessary. The last resort is to plan things around his homebody ways. such as dinner and wine in the house
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