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Angela, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 681
Experience:  n/a
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boyfriend and i are 18 years old just out of hs. i have a job,

Customer Question

boyfriend and i are 18 years old just out of hs. i have a job, hes never had a job bc hes busy with sports on weekends. i dont have a car his mom just bought him a 10k volvo and pays for his insurance. he constantly states you're rich, you're from ny (which is not true by any means) and that he's poor bc his mom only makes 60k a year. my father is disabled and neither of my parents went to college but they worked hard for what they own and to provide for our family. whenever my boyfriend and i go out he asks me to buy him $1-$5 items like cigars, taco bell and airsoft pellets. i don't mind but it starts to add up and i feel like he's using me for my money. on top of that he's either busy on weekends bc of sports or he goes out drinking at his friends house, he will invite me to come to his friends house but i don't think thats real quality time together because i don't like hanging out with a bunch of drunk idiots. he hardly makes plans in advance and he's never available to hang out sunday bc his dad comes into town (his parents are divorced), but i let that slide bc i know how important family time can be. he also made plans with me to go to prom months in advance but 2 weeks before he decided not to because "prom is stupid and gay", even after i expressed the fact that i had been looking at prom dresses and shoes. then he told me prom was expensive even though seniors get in free and i offered to pay for my own ticket, i didn't ask him to rent a limo and i didn't ask him to buy me a corsage, i just wanted to go to have a good/special time. it annoys me though because he constantly states "i am poor" even though he can go out to the shooting range, goes to the movie theater at least 2x a month and buys $40 video games. is he using me for money? and i'm starting to think he doesn't love me...does it seem like he's using me as a second option or for perks? what are your thoughts on my situation?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Angela replied 6 years ago.
Hello my name is Angela.
I am more than happy to assist you with your questions by giving you my honest and respectful opinion.

I am sorry for this painful time you are having. Based on what you have shared, it does appear that your boyfriend is selfishly taking advantage of your good, decent, and loving nature towards him. He has clearly behaved and continues to behave in selfish manners with no regard for your feelings, therefore, he takes and takes from you while yet having the audacity to continually disappoint you, not make time for you, and to belittle you! Please know that you deserve far better than this! You are clearly more mature than he is, well balanced, and of good judgment. You have been giving 100% to this relationship whereas he has been giving about 30%! You deserve to have someone who will also give 100% to you as you have to him. You deserve the best which includes someone who will love, honor, cherish, and respect you- your boyfriend is none of the above.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Relist: Answer quality.
Expert:  Angela replied 6 years ago.
What is it that you don't understand?