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in april, i found a roommate to move-in come July 1st. the

Customer Question

in april, i found a roommate to move-in come July 1st. the one "rule" that i had was that no men could stay overnight; she agreed. between april and july, she found herself a boyfriend and on july 1st when she moved in, she said that he would be staying the night. i stuck to my guns and said no. he was standing there and indicated that that was fine... she didn't seem as thrilled. during the first month, she had him over fo ran overnight and snuck him out, but i knew and in a civil manner, confronter her about my dissapointment. she gave a very lame answer as to why she did it (she didn't want to stay overnight alone, but i was just out late), and i compromised and said on the nights that i work overnight, he could stay over but she had to let me know when in advance and it couldn't be more than 2 times a month; she agreed. a few weeks later, she texted me one day and said that he would be staying over that night, which was a monday and she knew that i would be home; i said "no" and she demanded that we talk. we did, and i came to my final comprimise. from the beginning i said that visitors, specifically men, needed to leave by 10pm (she had agreed to that). i told her that i could get rid of the curfew, since he lives a distance away, but he couldn't stay overnight. since that talk, she has broken every agreement, and has him staying over at this very moment. she has almost become brazen about the fact that he's staying over, but she agreed to all of our agreements. what do i do? i'm done compromising and this is my home as much as hers (if not more since i've been here longer).
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  NorthwestAndrew replied 6 years ago.

These types of situations are always difficult. You are at somewhat of a disadvantage if you do not have such stipulations in writing which was agreed upon before taking occupancy. None the less most jurisdictions allow eviction from any property with adequate notice for almost any reason.


You need to clearly spell out in writing your full expectations. This is typically done in a "cease and desist" letter. If the behavior does not stop then it should be made aware that you fully intend to evict. When and if to begin the eviction process is up to you. Note that such laws very by jurisdiction but you typically need to provide a notice of eviction 14 days before the date of eviction (commonly called a 2 week notice). If the tenant has not left the property by the end of that time then you are within your rights to bring legal action toward the individual and/or contact the authorities and have the person forcibly removed.


Legally in most jurisdictions you can immediately send an eviction notice if you want them out. It's better however to first provide a "cease and desist" letter. The reason for this is that it shows that you acted in "good faith" and to try and correct undesired behavior before evicting. This is important should the tenant choose to take legal action against you.


In most cases the threat of legal action against an individual is sufficient enough to motivate them to change or find a new residence. During this time you will need to seek a new tenant if you would like to continue to keep the space occupied.



I appreciate the opportunity to serve you. If you have found this information helpful then please click the "accept" button. If you are still having issues or need additional assistance please reply.

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
thank you for this answer. unfortunately, i'm not the landord; we both have separate leases with the landlord, but i took this woman at her word when she agreed to this agreement. i don't know that i could take legal actions

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