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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1768
Experience:  PHD LPC
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I just found my birth daughter on Facebook. She is 20 years

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I just found my birth daughter on Facebook. She is 20 years old now. So far, I just confirmed it was her, then told her who I am. She didn't answer for over a week but finally responded and said I could ask her questions. She's curious to know what I want from her. I need some guidelines for talking to her. I'm sure you've been getting a lot of questions like this since Facebook became popular.
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Keane replied 7 years ago.
Hi, Facebook has caused quite a few circumstances where people come and ask for advice. I would start by asking her if she wants to hear about you, your decision to have her adopted and how you felt doing so. If she says yes, then tell her. You can ask her what it is she wants to know about you. She is probably just as curious as you. There is no guideline/ what is right /what is wrong. Just be yourself and let her lead the conversation. Reassure her that you do not want to interfere in her current life and just felt the need to connect with her in whatever way she is comfortable. Also, let her know that if anytime she decides to end the conversations/facebook relationship she should tell you and you should respect her decision. You won't scare her away.
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