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Angela, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 681
Experience:  n/a
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What would be an appropriate way for a married man with a libido

Customer Question

What would be an appropriate way for a married man with a libido to deal with a wife that is not interested in intimacy any longer. I'm at a crossroads I've asked for counseling and express my desire to be intimate with her but there seems to be no desire to rectify this situation. I don't want to make any foolish or bad decisions. I just want to know someone else's unbiased opinion.
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Angela replied 7 years ago.
Hello my name is Angela.
I am more than happy to assist you with your questions by giving you my honest and respectful opinion.

I think an appropriate way to deal with this (-in addition to continuing to try and get her to talk about it with you) is to do things which make her feel emotionally appreciated and close to you. In general, women are emotional beings. Therefore, it is in general easier for a woman to want to have sex with her husband when she feels emotionally close and appreciated by you. In lieu of this, I suggest doing more things for her that you know will make her feel emotionally closer to you and appreciated. For example: if she likes to go out to a romantic restaurant surprise her with a dinner reservation or maybe prepare a romantic dinner at home with flowers and soft music. Or go for a nice romantic walk with her in a park or by a lake etc. The above are just 3 examples of what you could do to make her feel emotionally closer to you and appreciated however, you know your wife the best so base your actions on what you know will make her feel emotionally closer to you and appreciated. Also, with everything that you do, don't ask her to have sex at the end of the night because it would more than likely ruin what you have done if she doesn't want to have sex. Instead, let the intimacy naturally occur, and if she backs off respect that and continue to do more things for her because there's a good chance that she will eventually choose to be intimate with you as long as you continually make her feel emotionally close to you and appreciated by you.

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