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Jennifer, School Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 397
Experience:  Extensive experience fostering family relationships through consultation / counseling.
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please help me with frequency of sexual activity between partners.

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please help me with frequency of sexual activity between partners. he wants to all the time. i want to about once a week.
Hello and thanks for using!

It's OK to have differing needs as far as frequency of sexual activity. The important thing, however, is that he listens to what you want and the two of you find a solution that meets both of your needs. It's concerning to me that you mention he doesn't care if you're ready and "gets it anyway." I hope you're not being forced in this situation and if you are, this is certainly not a safe relationship for you to be in.

I'll assume for now that he's not forcing you to have sex and that you're simply going through the motions even when you're not in the mood. It's perfectly acceptable (and healthy!) for you to tell him you're not in the mood tonight and suggest you do something else instead. If he's upset by this or attempts to "get his way" tell him again that it's not what you want and explain how his ignoring your request makes you feel. Ask how he's feeling in this situation as well and see if the two of you can come up with a plan that serves both of your needs without hurting either of you.
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