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Angela, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 681
Experience:  n/a
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I just recently went to a small reunion with girls from my

Customer Question

I just recently went to a small reunion with girls from my grammar school.. A few of us haven't see eachother in about 30 years.. Well at the reunion, I was attracted to one of the girls. I felt the attraction was mutual. I asked a few of the girls that I keep in touch with more and they agreed.. I sent them all a nice e-mail, stating that i was happy to see them and nowI considered them like sisters. I told her there was a different attraction so there was no mistake. I then sent her an e-mail asking her to go out with just me and she agreed. After that she went away to see her family and didn't have time to call me. I told her it was ok because I didn't want her to feel like I was pressuring her. Now she is back and I texted her and she responded. The only problem is that I feel that she should initiate a tex or a call first. This is throwing me off because now I am not sure if she likes me.. What should I do? Should I just move on or does she want to go slow?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Angela replied 7 years ago.
Hello J,
Due to this being a new relationship, I think it's to early to know if she really likes you and vice versa until you actually spend more time with each other. I think it is obvious based on her actions that she is interested in you. I think also that as you continue to establish this new relationship that it would be good to keep things on an even give and take balance. For example: since she responded to your text, you should go ahead and respond to her. Basically, if you initiate communication then wait for her to respond and vice versa; doing this will help to keep an even give and take balance to your communication efforts and you wouldn't have to worry about her feeling pressured.
Customer: replied 7 years ago.

I think your answer was well said. Here is another question.. How long do I go before I communicate with her again.. By me initiating, i feel like I'm bothering or being needy.. What do you think?

Expert:  Angela replied 7 years ago.
Hello J,
I think you could safely allow up to a day to pass before communicating with her in order to give it some space between communications and hopefully you will not feel as if your being a bother or needy due to allowing a day to pass between communications.
Customer: replied 7 years ago.
Okay we are getting closer to the final question... lol I just wanted to let you know that the last time we communicated was tuesday night, by way of text message.. It is always brief with her. The last thing I said because she just came back from vacation, but by the way she was out at church that night was to get some rest and feel free to call me when she had time. Would I be pushing if I texed her to say hello or should I just wait until she calls? I almost feel like this is a cat and mouse game and I don't like games. I am very confused!
Expert:  Angela replied 7 years ago.
Hello J,
I think based on what we discussed thus far, you could go ahead and send her a short text just to say hi but then after that start the new way of communicating with her that we discussed. This way you can get this last bit out of your system and then focus on the new way of communicating with her. The text should be quick and short such as "just wanted to say a quick hi" etc. and she will get the picture to contact you when she has a chance. Then after that just wait for her before contacting her again (-and focus your energy on something else so that you don't drive yourself crazy).