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Anna, Social Worker
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1945
Experience:  29 years experience in addictions & mental health. I'll tell you my honest opinion.
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I live in a resort town where a lot of people come and go.

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I live in a resort town where a lot of people come and go. I met a man seven months ago when I had a job working for a resort and they let the staff go when the season ended. I'm older than most of the staff, and they decided to hire younger staff members for the new season. The man I met and I have been seeing each other for four months and he was practically living with me. I'd mentioned I may need to move to get a job when we began dating, and I don't think he took me seriously. Last week he called and said he wouldn't be coming over for dinner, absence makes the heart grow fonder. The next night he called and said he was confused, he had a lot going on with his family right now and he was looking for a committment and then said he wouldn't be coming over that night either. I asked if I'd done something to upset him. No. I asked if he'd met someone else. No. I told him it might be a good idea that he not come over that night and he hung up. I called and invited him to dinner that Friday and he didn't return my call. I called him this week and left a voice message saying I missed him and I hoped to hear from him and he didn't return that call either. He has five pairs of jeans at my house, two DVDs, some tea he received as a gift and a thermometer (don't ask) at my house, so I called and left a message that I didn't blame him for not returning my calls but I had a lot of his things over here and asked how I ought to get them to him. He still hasn't called back. This is very frustrating, this guy had asked me to move in with him, I don't know what to do. Help!

Hi isle,

I think he's found someone else and he's giving you the cold shoulder because he's all into a new thing. Normal people break up like adults and give their stuff back, as well as being civil to each other. This sounds more like a switch was thrown and he just turned off. I'm sorry this happened to you. I would bag his stuff up and if he comes to get it, then fine. If not, give it to charity when you move. He's acting very rudely and immature.

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Customer: replied 7 years ago.

Hi Anna,


His older son has a drinking problem, and his younger son has some responsibility issues. From what I gather, he's spoiled them both a bit. His daughter also had a baby last week.


One thing I noticed he tends to treat me like a psychologist instead of a girlfriend from time to time. He kept saying he wanted to move slowly in the relationship, but he kept putting everything on me, asking if it was too soon to sleep together and so on. We did have a talk where he said he tried to move slowly, he was saying one thing and doing something else. He's also about 30 years older than I am, and has been married twice before. I'm reading this and thinking how I really didn't think things through very well before getting involved with this guy.

Hi isle,

I'm thinking this is not a good catch...set him free and move on.