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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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Hi, I seem to keep finding problems with my girlfriend. Weve

Resolved Question:

Hi, I seem to keep finding problems with my girlfriend. We've had talks before and they usually go well but it seems that I am always the one with the problem to address. I'm not sure if I'm too demanding or if I have some real grounds to be upset. I fear that if I complain too much I'll drive her away. We've been dating for 5 months and lately I'm feeling less desired. We used to have sex several times a week. Now if we may have sex three times a week max. Also lately it seems like she won't stay over but maybe once a week and is often looking for an excuse to go home. I feel like it's because she's bored. She will usually stay with me if I make some social plans for a night. I feel like I have to find something fun for her to do every night just to keep her around. It would be nice to be able to talk to her about this but I'm not sure about when or how.
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 7 years ago.

Good Afternoon,


It is really common after a while for partners in a relationship to become more used to each other and for the sexual intimacy to decrease.

Relationships go through stages and initially each person is learning about the other, trying to impress them etc. With time, this stage wears off which, does not mean that there is less love in the relationship. You may be right- she may be bored or the other possibility is that she may feel secure in the relationship and therefore not find the reason to stay because she trusts you and knows you'd be there for her.


If you are planning on talking to her perhaps you'd want to plan a nice dinner first and then after everyone had had their meal and is all relaxed say that you want to talk to her over coffee or a glass of wine. Begging the conversation by sharing your observation and ask her how she feels. Make sure she does not feel blamed for anything. Also, it helps to make her feel special perhaps get her some flowers and a nice lingerie. Try to get her side of the story and if she feels the same as you or if she feels things are going well as they used to.

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