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Anna, Social Worker
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  29 years experience in addictions & mental health. I'll tell you my honest opinion.
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got a situation divorced 5 years x wife had two children

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got a situation divorced 5 years x wife had two children i was with them as a step dad from elementary age to graduation. When i divorced i ended all communication with them. Step son calls out of the blue found me on the internet. wanted reconciliation for our relationship and bring me into his family He is married with two lovely kids. I am Married now for the second time current wife and her family hold to the idea that there should be no further communication with him. that it opens doors of problems. for example maybe he is spying for my x wife oh maybe we might be wanting to get back together and make a family again. IMPOSSIBLE. i am just interesting in including him into my life. it is a nice reward to know that you did some good in a marriage even when it falls apart. i need some feed back hear i am up against the wall and outnumbered by her family
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Anna replied 7 years ago.

Hi Duff,

I support you in continueing your relationship with your stepson. I also can't imagine why you new family would be so jealous and suspicious. What if he reported every single detail of your new life back to your ex? So What? Are you doing something wierd? Are they feeling guilty about something and don't want anyone to see their shame?

He's a married man with children who likes you. My goodness, do any of them consider that they may have something to gain by having someone like them? That meeting people who were important to you in another phase of your life might give them more reason to respect you? Your new family has the chance to learn all kinds of new things about you that would give them the opportunity to love you more and see the good in you and your accomplishment in raising this boy.

My advice? Move forward and invite them to look for the good in this - they'll find it if they're willing.

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