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Anna, Social Worker
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1945
Experience:  29 years experience in addictions & mental health. I'll tell you my honest opinion.
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i am in my second year of marriage and around the time our

Customer Question

i am in my second year of marriage and around the time our first anniversary i was caught talking to another women and for the past year i have been trying to stay. we haven't had any counseling but i feel i can make it through the marriage with out this happening again. my wife has no trust in me. before we married she cheated on me a few times and i have put my feelings aside to be with her. this past week she threatened to take my son from me. she says it was in anger but i cant help but feel that thats what is gonna happen. this was my biggest fear entering the marriage. is there anything to do. im ready to leave over this. i grew up with a mother who did this to my father and i don't want to flip out like he did.
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Anna replied 7 years ago.
Hi fu,

You guys need to get into counseling ASAP. This is dangerous ground you're both treading and the big guns have been pulled out....not good at all, and escalation can make you both say things you don't mean. The problem with that is words are like toothpaste - once it's out of the tube, you really can't ever get it back in.

I recommend getting an appt with someone ASAP and then stop talking about any marital issues until the appt. Just don't go there. It sounds like you both have baggage with each other and families and you need someone to help you sort through it. Call a truce and divert your attention any way you can till you can get to the counselor.