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Dr Rossi
Dr Rossi, Licensed Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  Certified Hypnotherapist, Author, 13+years of experience.
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I have been having problems with my boyfriend of 3years, hes

Customer Question

I have been having problems with my boyfriend of 3years, hes very busy in his life and i don't think he has time for me anymore. He said he would make time and put more of an effort in, but im his last priority and his friends come before me.Im really unhappy and we just had a fight, i don't know if we are broken up or not? but he thinks im just over reacting and i need to chill out and be ok with not seeing him every weekend.He only invites me to something if i ask to come..i think we need to communicate more about when we see eachother...otherwise he gets booked up with his friends.I really dont know what to do anymore...?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 7 years ago.

Good Evening,


It is not uncommon for partners who have been together for one or both to want to spend time with friends or doing things that interests him. After a while, the relationship becomes more steady and the need to constantly do things together or be together wears off. That is normal. It is healthy to be autonomous in any relationship. Otherwise the people become enmeshed and that is not healthy.

Only you know what kind of a relationship and attention level you would want to get from him. If you are truly unhappy, then go after what you believe will make you happier.

Otherwise, the two of you got to seriously talk about this and where each one sees the relationship going.
Customer: replied 7 years ago.
yes we arranged to have a talk today at 11am, and he said please be here on time because i have to shoot to a bbq afterwards. He only left us half an hour to seriously talk about our relationship and where it is going. i said to him im not going to talk to him if he is just going to leave 30 minutes later to a bbq and tell me i have to go home, it showed me hes not really taking it seriously. i havent seen him all week and hes going to a friends bbq where he was the night before! we had a bit of a fight and i told him he can contact me when he can be bothered making decent time for his gf untill then im not waiting around. He replied and said ''good for you''. that shows me he really doesnt care. but he said he wanted to talk at 11 but he had plans afterwards. i changed the plan and it was my fault. Now we are getting no where...
Expert:  Dr Rossi replied 7 years ago.
He does sound aloof. It is best to plan the talk w/o other distractions and that you tried to do that. Ask him if he would be willing to go for a couple's session with a therapist. You can only do so much on your end.