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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1768
Experience:  PHD LPC
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SO damned confused! girlfriend has all the traits of Borderline

Customer Question

SO damned confused! girlfriend has all the traits of Borderline Personality Disorder. The Histrionic vampire! Yet, I dont care, I want to go and see her again, but all my logic says DONT go there again. Its not long before shes painful company, but her love is so cute, I cant snap out of feeling bad for leaving...HELP! A year later, I dont know if this is love or sickness.
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Keane replied 7 years ago.
That is what love will do to you! and to have your logical self telling you NO......if you love her, love her, just don't rush into anything permanent like marriage. You can't help who you love so it's not a sickness, it's love. It is what it is and if she is truly BPD in time you may tire of the drama or learn how to live with it. Yes, it can take years and if there is something about her that you love enough to put up with the behavior then that's your choice. Did you ever stop and think that maybe you want to "fix" her, make her not be so histrionic, BPD? Many couples stay together because one thinks they can make the other person whole, just a thought. Or maybe you like the challenge?
Love is confusing to you because your logical side is fighting with your emotional side. What to do? Let it run it's course, if you are serious go to couple's counseling or read up on BPD and find out how to live with someone with this disorder (if she has been diagnosed or not)...educating yourself will save you a lot of angst ...
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Customer: replied 7 years ago.

So you actually think a relationship with a BPD GF has a good chance and that they woulg go to therapy AND admit anything wrong with them? I dont know if you see the pain of this situation...