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Feedback for Anna from Suky. Thanks Anna - painful though your resopnse was I couldn't agree more - I've wasted enough time and energy in a relationship thats going nowhere.
Hi again, I confronted this man, Sam, and he has made it clear that nothing is going to change for quite some time - his business needs all his attention at the moment. He's even moving away from the area where I live to a farm about 1.5 hours drive away. He's asked me to go with him but I can't because my children 20 and 14 are very settled here and I've moved away from them with Sam before and things didn't work out - he was never around and my children and I spent a lot of time alone. I told him several months ago that I didn't think our relationship could "handle" another period of seperation. I currently am only seeing him once or twice a week - luckly he's just not availble to see me more often.
I've been seeing a Physcologist and am sorting out my issues and generally feeling much happier. My problem now is that I'm ready to move away from this relationship, even talking about the time I've spent waiting for things to happen, like meeting his daughter, moving in together etc. is painful and I don't want to keep reliving it.
The problem is, because I'm seeing him he thinks everything's fine, when in fact I've given up. I lost my job last year and with the recession things are still very tight in my work area (recruitment). Am desperately looking for work because at the moment he pays my rent because I can't afford it. I'm bankruipt and cannot at present get a lease on my own. I even thought that a shelter would be ok but I have the children to consider. As nasty as it sounds I need to keep having the rent paid until I find work and the only way to do this is to have him continue thinking everything's fine. How do I do this - I'm distancing myself emotionally but still find that being with him, and knowing he's rejecting me, in terms of being in a relationship with me, very difficult. Hate to say it but feel like a prostitute and need some advice. It's very clear that he only wants the relationship on his terms so I don't see hope for the future here. Any advice, please. Many, many thanks Suky