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Walter, Relationship Mentor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 11528
Experience:  Mentoring couples on relationship issue and self understanding. (JA's Relationship Mentor)
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I recently reconnected with my highschool crush through facebook..I

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I recently reconnected with my highschool crush through facebook..I wasn't looking for him but we just happened to speak and it began from there.We have been communicating since June 2009 through texts,emails photos and of course the phone calls..He has never been married and doesn"t have any children which is great..but I have 3 children ages 13,14,15 from a previous relationship which lasted 15 years and was horrible with the exception of our children..Anyway I was hurt from my past relationship after being separated for 2 years and did not wish to date fearing I would be rebounding and ruin a potential healthy situation from hang ups from my past disastrous relationship..The new friend in my life has made me so happy just through our chatting and constant commnication we can talk for hours and have not seen eachother in person for over 20 years..My question is we have a lot of similiar interest and he does want children and to be in a healthy committed relationship.
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Walter replied 7 years ago.



It sounds like you have been taking things slow which is great, when you have children the last thing you want is to jump into anything that may hurt you or them. As for being a rebound, I do not suspect that this is the case. A rebound typically is when someone jumps into a relationship head first and gets caught up quickly. In your case you have handled this well.........getting to know each other and just communicating.


I think continuing with this may be a good thing for you and your children. Just because your marriage did not work does not mean you should give up completely. It just means that you are a little more experienced and need to take it slow.


I would suggest continuing what you are doing now and maybe setting up a date and go from there. Take it slow and get to know each other and at your own pace. Of course you already know not to jump to fast. The key is to look at this and not the past, of course you are going to be weary after what you experienced before but the fact remains that not all relationships end in such a way and not everyman is going to be like your ex. Give your new friend a chance to show you who he is by taking it slow and enjoying each other.


I know it is hard jumping back into that pond, but as long as you are keeping your eyes open and giving him a chance to show you who he is then you are unlikely to make the mistakes you are afraid of.




If my answer was helpful please don't forget to click accept. We can still communicate if you have any additional questions or would just like to talk.

Walter and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 7 years ago.
Thank you..I was feeling the same way.This guy and I have been candid and he wants to know every detail about such as my likes and dislikes.He has shared a lot with me as well.He has mentioned how he was very imature and was totally different from the man he is today,he also stated that he isn't perfect and has grown from mistakes in the past.He always ask about my children and has stated that he's not going to let me get away again and feels that this is we reconnected and both happen to be available at this time he doesn't know it but his presence has helped me see that my ex has definitely taken me for granted and to realize that i deserve love and respect.We plan to see eachother on his birthday and spend the day together..He also asked me to not tell anyone I'm single any longer I guess to exclude any other potential suitors I will take it slow..but this heart has been vacant for so many years she is happy and I can smile again which was something I did but i do this more often ..even if this relationship doesn't work i don't want to be in that negative place again w kids dad took mr and left me in a pool of despair.I think this is unusual since i have never solely communicated with a man this way..My friend also told me he wants us to be friends before we fool around and get things confused ..he is hoping that we are compatible and have a grounded relationship as friends and lovers before we get carried away and have sex as a basis only which i don't desire as well!I was in a place where i didn't think that i was beautiful or deserving of happiness..I have been lifted from all of this and it took me a while to see myself as the girl as once was who grew into a lovely women who has big heart and a friend till the end and a great mom.Thank you....FOR YOUR RESPONSE AGAIN!
Expert:  Walter replied 7 years ago.

Your very welcome, it sounds like you are ready for this. Sadly to many women jump out of a bad relationship and then jump into another assuming things will ultimately work out without any real work. It sounds like this is not the case with you, and taking it slow is the best route.


I wish you the best, XXXXX XXXXX you need anything please let me know.