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Ask TherapistMaryAnn Your Own Question
TherapistMaryAnn, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1700
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
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I am seperated and the woman I am seeing is married but living

Customer Question

I am seperated and the woman I am seeing is married but living a seperate life from her husband, they live in the same household and he is seeing someone else also. They have a daughter who is in her early teens and is obviously having a problem with the living arrangements. They also are having a problem with who is going to move out of thier home and I am left wondering if her and I are going to be together. I love her more than I have ever loved anyone and I am willing to wait as long as she does not ''reconnect'' with her husband. I worry that I have given her all I can considering the circumstances and I am afraid of getting hurt. She is also stressed over the entire situation. Her main problem is how her daughter is going to handle the change and she is afraid she is going to ruin the childs childhood. Should I wait, and what advice could I give my woman?
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Cher replied 8 years ago.
Hi, and thanks for your question.

How long have you been seeing this woman?

How long has she and her husband been living separate lives, living in the same house?

You said you are separated, and have you or your wife already filed for divorce?

Did the woman you're seeing tell you that the only reason she has not moved ahead with a separation or any divorce proceedings is because of hurting her daughter?

Are they having a problem with who is going to move out of their house because neither of them wants to move; is the house in both their names?

How often do you see each other and where do you spend time together, at your home?

Thanks for all your additional detail.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.

I have been seeing her for about 9 months, and we have been romanticly involved for about 4 months.


They have been living seperate lives for the 4 months her and I have been close, he has said he would break up with his girlfriend if she would take him back, she is the one who wants out of the marriage (13 year marriage)...even before we met.


Yes we have filed for divorce.


Her daughter and the home seems to be the major hang ups., the home is in both of thier names and they have proceeds to split in the event of a sale.


We see each other on average 2 to 3 times per week, and at times my home.


Thank you