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KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with
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My husband is a well known artist. He has a groupy who is

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My husband is a well known artist. He has a "groupy" who is also an artist. Whenever he has a show, she turns up uninvited. She manipulates the conversation over and over to art matters, which I am not a part of. I find it exasperating to (1) have her show up unannounced; (2) have her loudly focus any conversation imy husband and I are involved in, nto a conversation between my husband and herself about (3) my husband refuse to say or do anything to stop this rude behavior. She has also gone to a movie with a bunch of us, only to sit right next to my husband with her arm around him. She has been married for a long time to a wonderful man. I feel her competitiveness and her rude and thoughtless behavior impossible to accept.

Any advice? Should I confront her?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.


Since you have already talked to your husband about her behavior then it's time to go to the actual source. If it has gotten out of hand then it's time to tell her that you are on to her and that she needs to stop before she is no longer invited to functions even though she wasn't invited anyway, it's time to tell her to stop acting in an inappropriate manner. As long as she gets away with this behavior the more she is going to do it. The only way to stop her is possibly to confront her in front of your husband and then tell her that he is your husband and she needs to respect that and go home to her husband. She may even be a little obsessed with your husband and the fact that they like the same things.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
Unfortunately she lives in Scottsdale, AZ and I live in NYC
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 7 years ago.


I would either call her and talk to her or write her a letter explaining how uncomfortable her actions make you feel and that out of respect you would like for the behavior to stop and tell her that it also makes your husband feel uncomfortable. If she feels that you will let her get away with behaving in such a way she will continue to act this way, so it's time to nip it in the bud now.

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