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KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with
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I am 37 and was dating a guy for about 4 months...I have been

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I am 37 and was dating a guy for about 4 months...I have been pretty stressed out about money and a new job etc. And he has had some things going on in his life too---his job, as well as his parents sepearating. About 6 weeks ago he told me that he wanted to break up and he was not happy. I got really upset--we were amazing friends---and I think we started leaning on each other more as friends than lovers because of what we were going thru. The night he broke up with me---he ended up changing his mind and saying we can take a break. I was really good in the begininng and did not contact him at all for the first few weeks. I then contacted him thru texts and sent him an email about what was going on in my life and why the stress may have hurt our realtionship.   I have not seen him in 6 weeks--but i always intiate the contact and have told him that when he is ready I am here to talk. This past friday I got really upset and texted him alot---acted crazy...I was upset and had been drinking wine. I apologized the next day and a few more times. He sent me atext back today and said that he can forgive..but not forget. I texted him back and said I was sorry he could not forget---and assumed he did not know what he wanted---and wish things were different. He then texted me saying he did not want to get into this via text messaging. I then agreed with him and asked him if we could meet and talk. I think he is going to end it... What do I do now--I have acted needy and not given him space...I really wanted this realtionship to work.


Unfortunately relationships need two people that are willing to work on the relationship and it seems like he is no longer willing to do that and it's in part because when he needed time you continues to contact him and like you said you acted needy and didn't respect that he needed space. If you would have given him that space no matter how long he needed he might have given you another chance but I think you are right that he wants to meet to tell you he is no longer willing to give the relationship another chance. What you are going to have to do is respect what he says and how he feels and what he wants to happen from here on in, if he does say he wants to break up ask if you can remain friends after the breakup and if he is willing to do that what you are going to have to do is show him that the way you acted before is not typical behavior for you. If he sees that you are the same person he fell in love with he may decide to give you another chance or start fresh and with a clean slate.

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