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robert baker
robert baker, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 128
Experience:  i am a couples councelor
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I want my ex-girlfriend and I to give us another chance. We

Customer Question

I want my ex-girlfriend and I to give us another chance. We were extremely close friends for 5 years before we were both single at the same time and finally started a relationship. We were together for just under two years and broke up 4 months ago after we sort of hit a rut and she began pulling away. When we broke up she said she needed time to focus on herself, which she has been doing, and that she wants to salvage the friendship (which was never a normal friendship because it threatened our relationships with other people.) However, I hear through close friends that she still thinks of me every day, and that she doesn't know if this break-up is forever ... but it appears to them like she has pushed all of this emotion aside and is simply not dealing with it.

I feel I need to talk to her soon and explain exactly how I feel, and that I think we need another chance because friendship doesn't feel like an option. How do I say these things?
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  robert baker replied 8 years ago.
I know you feel an urgency to speak with her and pour it on thick but i would recommend you give it a little time and not come on to strong. If she wants to be with you but still needs some time and space and you pour your heart out at the wrong time it will have a negative affect on your chances of being back with her. If she really cares and wants to be with you even if only a small part of her feels this way then your goal now should just be to spend time with her and make it enjoyable. Go to breakfast on sunday and a park afterwards to walk and talk. Do not focus on feelings and the future, just have fun with her and the rest will happen naturally. Do not be in a rush it will only push her away and do not make your conversations revolve around you and her being together or the reasons you are not me on this one. I hope this has been helpful please accept pay and feedback bonus always appreciated
Expert:  robert baker replied 8 years ago.
Is there anything else i can help you with?

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