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Merlo, Consultant
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Tax Consultant
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I am dating a jazz musician who travles frequently abroad.

Customer Question

I am dating a jazz musician who travles frequently abroad. He works very hard but is nevertheless generally very tight for money and therefore likes to watch his phone bill. I understand that to call from countries such as Russia it is very expensive. However, I do feel that I should get at least a text, if not a phone call, a day. He says the other musicians do not call their wives every day. Am I being unreasonable? I do come from a family background of very untrustworthy and unreliable men so I don't always trust my own judgement.
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Merlo replied 8 years ago.
Hello Fleurette,

These types of situations really vary depending on the individuals involved. But if your boyfriend travels frequently, then this is something that you probably just need to accept as part of his life and as part of your relationship, and not always expect a daily phone call or text message.

What the issue really comes down to is trust, and this is something that must be present for any relationship to be successful. And I think what you need to realize is that even if he did call you every day or send you text messages every day, that in itself would not mean he was being faithful to you. And that is where the trust must come in.

Little things like a phone call or a text message usually are a lot more important to a woman than they are to a man, so he probably does not see why this should be an issue in your relationship.

As long as everything else in your relationship seems to be on the "up and up" and you are happy with this man, then I would not let a missed phone call or text message stand in the way of giving this relationship a chance.

If this was helpful please press the Accept button.

Thank you Fleurette.

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