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KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 750
Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with
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I am 41 and married my 2nd husband a year and a half ago.

Customer Question

I am 41 and married my 2nd husband a year and a half ago. I was his 2nd wife, we each have a son, 13 and 11. When we married, we both had two homes, mine was a 4 bdroom home and his was a 2 bdroom twnhm. I had put my house on the market 6 mos prior to marriage as we had agreed that we would sell both our homes and then buy one together. However, after we married, I saw that he wasn't even close to putting his on the market. I realized that mine was the one that fit a family of 4 and decided to take mine off the market. I assumed that we would be living under one roof but to this date, a yr & a 1/2 later, he has yet to sell his house so we live in separate homes 25 mins apart. I am so angry at this point, how is this a marriage? It has created all kinds of problems and I've tried to tell him how I feel, he says "it's not a quick fix" or "stop being angry". What decent person does this to his wife and stepson, keeping them in separate homes? Should I stay or should I go?
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 8 years ago.


I think you should stay and try to find common ground together. What he may have meant by it not being a quick fix is with the economy the way that it is it could take some time to sell the house and he may not get what he wanted for the house. What you could suggest is for him to move in with you and you rent his place out that way you have steady income always coming in and then him and his son move to your home. You have to tell him that you will not live your married life apart and that you need to be a family unit TOGETHER. Since you have four bedrooms you have the room for everyone and have privacy and maybe make the fourth room an office or entertainment roomor guest. This really isn't a valid reason to just give up on the marriage when you can compromise on a fix. Talk to him about renting his place out and moving in with you and also you could find another home and rent both of yours out with the economy that is a sure fire way to always have an income coming in.