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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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Hi Im 57 years old and I had for the last six months a really

Resolved Question:

Hi I'm 57 years old and I had for the last six months a really weak erection in my relationship with my fiance and, things are getting bad in the relationship. She is 50 years old. All start when she talk with me about how good sex she had with her ex. It make feel since I'm not good enough for her. My question is posible I'm having impotence, or what is happen with me. What kind of help I need to find. We talk opening with my Fiance about it. She is a great woman. I feel bad not to be able to perform some times in the sexual relationship. We love each other very much and we do not want to lose this great blessing oportunity to be together. Answer to my email address:[email protected], Please. thank you for your help in advance.
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.

You said it only started when she was talking about great sex with her ex?

Did you have any problems before that?

Do you masturebate? If so do you have a problem when you masturebate?

Why was she talking about sex with her ex?

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Yes all start after this conversation. No i didn't have any problem before. We start this relation after I have been a single dad raising 2 kids with special needs, dedicated to them for 6 years i didn't have time to date. We did have a great sex and she always say all is going getting better and better. She was talking about her ex because she was in the process of the divorce and I ask what type of problems they have. She was and still mad with him because He took so much advantage and money from her, before to be separated. During my time alone I did masturbate some times without any problem and I did not to often.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.

I feel that since you so strongly connect this to when she talked about her ex and sex, thats when the problem started, that you are feeling that maybe you are not living up to the sex that this other man gave her. You should remember that regardless of that, she is no longer with him, she is with you. I will tell you, women forget about great sex in time, the guy they always remember is the guy who is good to them and gave them their heart.

I know this doesn't make you feel better about things, but you have to try and put it out of your head. She's with you because there's something there that attracted her to you, and you said yourself that she said the sex is getting better and better. You can try to talk to her and let her know that you don't want to hear about their sex life anymore, that it bothered you to talk about it. As for the sex, take things slow and try to engage in as much foreplay as possible. You can also try to masturbate and see if you run into the same problem.

If you cannot get past what she has told you about this guy, you may want to consider couples therapy. If you physically have problems, even when trying to masturbate, then I would get checked by your primary physician, being sure to let him know what the problem is (believe me, he's heard much more :) You'll want to rule out completely any physical problems before starting to work on the emotional/psychological ones.

I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more


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