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Walter, Relationship Mentor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 11528
Experience:  Mentoring couples on relationship issue and self understanding. (JA's Relationship Mentor)
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my husband abusing me all started when he know i dont love

Resolved Question:

my husband abusing me all started when he know i don't love him anymore, he star hittin me, preventing me from seeing my family, calling them its very stressing for me to leave a life like that, i met someone 5 months ago which give me that respect and love i never had with my husband, my husband always insult me if i leave him for someone else PLEASE HELP ME. WHAT SHALL I DO.
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Walter replied 8 years ago.



Are you currently living with your husband?


Any children in your marriage?


Is he currently abusing you? (Emotionally or physically)


Do you want to leave your husband?


Do you have somewhere to go if you leave?



Customer: replied 8 years ago.
hiya sorry i could not reply to you earlier i could not get access to any computer. yes am leaving under same roof with him but we not having any sexual contact, i don't have any children, last time he abusing me was sunday 07.12.2008 but after that am not talking to him am just avoiding him, on sunday him did abuse me emotionally and try to hit me too. I do have some where to go but am so scared these people might be in trouble coz of me. I got a mate in london and one in colgester but as he is quiet with me now am ok. But all his relatives are coming friom france on the 22.12.2008 to 03.01.2009 so i intend to tell his mum and aunty how he is behaving is that a good idea to do or not, coz am a muslim in our culture we have to sort things by taliking to elder parents, am just confuse what good for me......... thanks for every things sir, bye
Expert:  Walter replied 8 years ago.



Waiting is never a good idea when abuse is going on! Add to the fact if you tell his family he may become angry and may take it out on you. Never ever leave yourself in a position where he can hurt you.


Abuse is a very serious matter and you have a right to be safe without the fear of him hurting you. A real man never uses his hands on a women regardless of what is going on and your husband should know better regardless of the situation.


If you have somewhere to go I would advise you to do so. If he hits you then you have the right to file for a restraining order to keep him away from you. There are shelters as well who will help take you in if abuse is going on in the home.


I know leaving is very scary, but the reality is you are in far more danger staying with a abusive man then by leaving. As far as the new guy, make sure you do not get yourself into a position where you can become hurt. Take one thing at a time. You must first deal with your marriage before considering a new relationship.


Your first step is to get away from your husband in a safe environment then you can begin the process of a separation and or divorce. Once your marriage is over you can consider the new relationship.........just do not jump into anything to quickly.



Walter and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Expert:  Walter replied 8 years ago.



I just want to close up a couple of loose ends here. Can you answer the following questions.


Where are you located? (You mentioned London but I want to make sure)


Is your husband Muslim as well?



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