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KimberlyF, Longtime Relationship Expert
Category: Relationship
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Experience:  Relationship expert for almost three years with
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I met an amazing guy online (he happens to be a Marine stationed

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I met an amazing guy online (he happens to be a Marine stationed in Japan). We talked quite a bit on the phone and online and seemed to hit it off. He came home last week on a two-week leave and we spent the weekend together. Overall, it was a good weekend but I was fairly quiet because I was unsure if he was interested in me. We did sleep together the first night we were together but not the rest of the weekend. He was very nice, polite and tried to make me laugh the entire weekend, but he also seemed a little reserved. I told him after I left that I was sorry for being so quiet/reserved, it's just that I like him and didn't know if the feeling was mutual. He joked, said I was crazy and to have no worries. I don't know what to do, how to act, etc. and I would like to see him again before he goes back to Japan until August. I really like this guy and don't know if I screwed things up!! Help!! What can I do to win this guy's heart?
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 8 years ago.


Since the first meeting was awkward and you felt you were acting weird then try being yourself the next time everything you usually do or the way you usually act with a guy then do that, he would appreciate you being yourself than trying too hard, he could probably sense that this wasn't the way you are usually. Ask him what he is doing and then invite him out again and remember this is your chance for redemption so be yourself this time remember you have to stand out from the crowd. Too many women make the mistake of pretending to be something they're not. In most cases they actually try and appear a little simpler than they actually are. Men actually are more attracted to intelligent women. Don't be afraid to be yourself around a man, he'll actually find that endearing and refreshing. Smile and be warm and friendly when you want to win him over. If your body language suggests that you're open a man will be much more drawn to you. Men enjoy women who are easy to be with enjoy the moments you are with him and be easygoing and fun loving he will instantly be drawn to you.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
What if I already blew it and he's just saying no worries because he's a nice guy?? While he is in the states, there is aXXXXXbetween us so it doesn't make it that easy to see one another again. However, I will make it work if he wants to see me again. How do I know if he really does like me and wants to see me again?? Also, I don't want to appear desperate, so how often should I contact him via IM, emails or calls? Thanks.
Expert:  KimberlyF replied 8 years ago.


Maybe you should contact him by email first and tell him that you had a nice time even though you were nervous because of meeting him for the first and liking him so much and if he replies then you know he isn't just done with you and if he doesn't contact you then that will be your answer as to whether you blew it or not. Write the email and then wait but it depends on how long he is staying in the states before he leaves. The email is your best bet to get a feel for if he is even interested anymore because if he doesn't reply then that could mean that he isn't interested anymore or may be busy that is why I say give it a couple of days.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.

I actually already sent that message, as I stated in my first question, when I told him that I was sorry for being so quiet/reserved, it's just that I like him and didn't know if the feeling was mutual and he joked, said I was crazy and to have no worries. That was an instant message I sent him and that was his, he must be interested somewhat since he replied??


Thank you.

Expert:  KimberlyF replied 8 years ago.


True, and if things went that bad he would just want to get rid of you and not contact you anymore but that wasn't the case. Write him and ask him if the two of you could meet again for lunch or dinner before he leaves. If you still keep things awkward he will only chalk it up to a lost cause. You have to show him that you are more assertive than the first time you met and that was a one time thing. Be more sure of yourself and what you want so not to let him get away.

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