My partner has left my 2 months ago.
Yes ther were problems in our relationship. I think the main problem in our relationship was that our feelings for each other (that is my love for her) was not expressed for her to see. I did not tell her that I loved (love her), and regretably I did not show it clearly. She has complained of that after we have splitted.
Also I think she missed events and travelling together but that was hard to find time to do that because we both have demanding jobs and small children and were both stressed an worn down because of our jobs.
We always have had problems talking of our feelings for each other. My feelings for her are very strong and I was afraid of being carried away by my feelings and I therefor controlled them effectively. What I should not have done!
I think she mainly missed expression of love and tenderness and left me when another man offered that to her.
I don't know for sure that he has not told his wife yet, but my expartner told me that he was not ready to fully engage with her because his family has 'special problems'. Sounds fishy to me.
I was insecure if she loved me, and did not dare to ask her! After we have splitted she has complained that we never married, so maybe she once wished to be married to me.
Yes, I have told her, that I want her back, not to our former relationship but to a better one. I have also told of my love and devotion for her, and that I am presently seeing a psycyatrist to learn to be a better husband for her and that I will wait for her until she is ready. Yes she knows that I would like to marry her and have a future with her.
Regretably her answer was that she could not see a future for us because she felt herself unloved by me and that she had pursued the chance with the other man since mid-summer this year.
She has found her own apartment so our children lives by me half the time and by her the other half of the time.
I am 51 and my expartner is 45. Our children ar 9 and 5 years of age.
I also have told her that I understand her actions (what I do) and that I have forgiven her infidelity (what I also have done).
I know that a future with my expartner looks gloomy but if I can do anything to reestablish my family under changed and better conditions I will. Whenever we meet I assure her of my love for her and that I am working to heal the wounds. I am controlled not angry but firm and caring for her.
Best regards Carsten
(strange name, I am a dane!).