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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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how do i put the fun back in to my relationship i feel my

Customer Question

how do i put the fun back in to my relationship? i feel my girlfriend is bored of us as a couple and is not happy but wants to work things out
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.
How long have you been together?

What are your ages?

Why do you think she is bored/not happy?

Have you talked about it?

Customer: replied 8 years ago.

19 months


I'm 26 and my partner is 32


i'm not sure but it has been said to me by her friends that she is getting fed up and feeling trapped.


i have tried to talk to her on many occasions but just get shouted at. We did speak rationally one night and we have agreed to work on the issues but i feel the effort is more on my behalf than hers


hope this helps

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
do you need any more information? as i am going to bed now.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.
Hi I apologize, I had stepped away for a moment.

Do you know why she is fed up? feeling trapped?

Do the two of you go out and do things?

Are both of you working?

What does she shout about?

What are her complaints?

Do you live together? how often do you see her?

Customer: replied 8 years ago.

no i don't know really? i think she might feel i'm insecure about us but i'm not as i just want her to tell me what is bothering her.


yes we go out all the time when she is in the country as she is airline crew.


we both work


the fact that i keep on asking her to talk to me as i know there is something wrong but she will not tell me.


she has not said what her complaints are?


we do live together i see her when she is not working sometimes could be for a week or not even two days depends on her work.

Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.
It's a strange situation, as you are not telling me any reason she would have to be angry or want to leave or break up. I think you said it best when you said, how to put the fun back into the she may think now that you are pressuring her too much. When she does come home, don't ask what's bothering her. Just smile, act happy, and do something special for her. A nice dinner, clean house, something fun that you know she will like and that you can enjoy together. Don't pressure her to talk to you at this time, as her problems could be job related and she's trying to work through them. Of course it's important that the communication between the two of you is improved and established, and if you stay together, you may want to think about going to couples counseling and see why it's so hard for the two of you to communicate. It could be that she doesn't respond well to being questioned and that she sees it as a form of you trying to control her. On the other hand, you see it as her not wanting to talk, and so you push more. One of you has to give in a little, and seeing that you're so concerned about it, try to see what happens if you back down some. I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more



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