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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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i found out that my husband is taking viagra. he has not told

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i found out that my husband is taking viagra. he has not told me that he is taking it. furthermore i believe that he is leaving the pills in his car. what should i think of this. how should i approach this. a million things are running through my head. is he cheating on me? why would he keep them in his car? i believe he is supposed to take them 30-60 minutes before intercourse. i found out about a year ago that he had a prescription for viagra. i asked him about it and he got embarresed and said that he was not going to pick up the prescription. that now that i knew it made him feel like less of a man. Now i find out that not only did he pick up that precription but he just picked up another one on October 20th....i was out of town on that date..... i dont know what to think. He is almost always around and is easily reachable so i am thinking...when would he have the time to cheat ...but i just dont know. can u help???
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.
Hello Mtj

How is your sex life?

How did you find out he picked up that other prescription?

How many pills in a prescription?

What are your ages?

Has he had sexual problems with you?

Have either of you ever cheated?

How long have you bee married? together?

Chase
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Our sex life is great. He always wants to have sex with me. sometimes 2-3 times a night. we have been married for 13 years. i am 33 and he is 42. Sice we have been married i have never cheated and i am not aware of him cheating on me. Before we were married he was back and forth between me and the mother of his 3 children. as far as i know he has not been with her or anyone else since our marrage. his ex is married and they DO NOT have a good relationship. it is not her i am worried about AT ALL. but i do not know if there is anyone else i should be concerned with. he is cop so he has crazy hours. I called the pharmacy where we usually do business and they told me that he picked up that prescription on oct 20th. i specifically asked if he had picked up a prescription for viagra. i was talking about the one from a year ago. not knowing that he picked up one recently. i do not know if i should confront him or not..
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.
Hello Mt,

It seems as if you are reaping the benefits of his Viagra. It seems that he may feel like he is failing you and the age difference may be playing a big part in that. He wants to feel that he can satisfy you and he may not have felt that he was doing that. The fact that your sex life is great makes me feel like "if it ain't broke, don't fix it", but I am a little concerned that he's being deceptive. He's probably keeping them in the car so that you won't find them, and he's probably embarrassed about them.

If you confront him he could get embarrassed all over again, which could hurt the relationship. If you could talk to him about it in a non-confrontational way, for example maybe taking the pills and putting them in his bedside drawer, and when he asks about it, smile, kiss him and let him know that you shouldn't have any secrets between the two of you. If you handle it correctly this can be good for the both of you and actually might bring the two of you closer. I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more

Chase
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
thank you very much for your advice. i have been going crazy thinking all of these crazy thoughts. i kept telling myself that he would never betray me. but i did not want to be taken advantage of. this is all i have been thinking about for the past few days. it is actually making me sick. he noticed that something was bothering me but i strugged it off and said i was fine. i will do what you suggested and see what happens. thanks again.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 8 years ago.
If your sex life was suffering, I would be worried. However from what you're telling me it sounds like he's just a little embarassed about it. Dont drag it out, be lighthearted about it, and show him how much you love him. If anything else happens, I'm always here if you need to talk more.

Chase
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