How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Ms Chase Your Own Question
Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Ms Chase is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

He seems like the perfect guy. He is perfect for me, he is

This answer was rated:

He seems like the perfect guy. He is perfect for me, he is the most perfect person in all ways.. the thing is that I am not sure if he is the one? am I wrong? I expect the flame you felt at 15, I love him and I truly enjoy being with him, we have many interests in common and everybody says we are the perfect couple. The thing is sexually I am not that interested, there is no exitement about it.. I am only 28. he is 28. What can I do to find out?
Can you explain more about how you're not interested sexually? in what ways? anything specific?

How long have you been together?

How long have you known him?

Where did you meet?

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
we went on holidays to the beach, I did not want to have any sexual relations with him, after partying even if I have drunk a few glasses of wine, I am not interested. I dont like having sex with him, and I believe that is not normal at our age.

How long have you been together?
I have been with him for over a year now. he is 27 and I was his first sexual experience. It didn´t really go very well the first time, he finished in a record time. The next couple of times went better but not fantastic, only once or twice it has been really great, but We don´t really make time for that.

When we were going out, not yet formalized the relationship, we always were into kissing and making out, like teenagers. now that seems to be over.

How long have you known him?
I have known him for 2 years now.

Where did you meet?
At a bar I came to say hi to some friends I only stayed for 15 minutes. he wasnt drinking I wasnt drinking either. we had a great talk there.

Thank you for that additional info.

I can see that if the first time wasn't great and subsequent tries werent that great, why would you want to have sex with him, right? You already know that it's not going to be fulfilling for you, there's no joy, passion or pleasure in it for you, so why do it.

I had a few other questions, related to my answer.

Were the times it were really great something you would want to repeat?

Do you and him discuss this? Is he willing to try and improve on his technique?

more inportantly, if he were, would you be willing to give him the chance to change?

It's important to understand that if you really love him and want to build a life with him...children...marriage...a home, then this sexual issue has to be gotten over, and it's not impossible. Tell me how you feel about him aside from the sex.

Ms Chase and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
We talked, he was willing to try and improve, and he even went to seek for professional help, but I was never in a mood to give him a second chance. I dont know I guess I just hope the right moment will come without much planning but it didn´t.
We just broke up a week ago. I thought that by spending a time separated from each other we would , or I would be certain if I love him 100% I don´t know I seemed like the best option available. I miss him but I am not suffering, I guess until I see him dating another girl I will realize if I love him or not..
aside from sex, I think he is the most amazing person in the world. he is a beautifull person inside and out.

Related Relationship Questions