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Ask TherapistMaryAnn Your Own Question
TherapistMaryAnn, Counselor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1701
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
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Ive been doing the dance with this guy for a year--he is in

Customer Question

I've been doing the dance with this guy for a year--he is in Germany and me in the States. I have been there twice, he has been here once, so the other night I posed this to him, "you know, I have strong feelings for you, you inspire me and I love having you in my life, do you see us going any further (by the way, I always let him call me and he calls about every 3 days). At first, he dodged the question and I pressed him further and he replied, "you know realistically, how is it going to work, you are in Houston and I am in Hanover--let's just 'grow the relationship." then i said, "well, it has to be reciprocal, he said, "what do you need, do you want flowers, candy, what? I said, I don't need anything, I just need to know you are there. He said, "let's grow the relationship." What should I think. I think he is confused. He lost his wife 4 years ago to cancer, he sold his business, he is in the throes of change. Do I just consider him a friend (even though I really like him)
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  JR, M.A. replied 8 years ago.



The most apparent problem is the distance. Are you willing to move to Germany? Is he willing to move to the states? Let me know and then I will respond to your question.