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Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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I cheated on my boyfriend of a year with another guy. It started

Customer Question

I cheated on my boyfriend of a year with another guy. It started as a friendship thing, we were both in relationships, but after a month of cheating, I broke it off with my boyfriend because I coudn't take lying to him or being worried about getting caught anymore. The other guy always said he was going to break up with his girlfirend soon even though I never asked. I moved two hours away from the town where both he and my ex boyfriend live. My ex and I started talking again, I was a little lonely living alone in a big city, and soon it turned into us talking everyday and him coming to visit me (and sleeping together). The other guy didnt call me for three weeks and I was starting to think he never would but then he called last night and asked if he could see me one night next week. The truth is I like him a lot, hes really down to earth (unlike my ex), and even though I know I'm just a booty call since he hasnt broke up with his girl, I want to see him. Any advice
Submitted: 9 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 9 years ago.

What are your ages?

Do you want to get back with your boyfriend?

Are you ok with being just a sex thing?

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
The ages are a big factor I left out. Both this other man and my boyfriend are much older than me, almost twice my age. I don't want to get back with my boyfriend but I'm scared to let him go completely because I know he loves me a lot and is always there for me. It didnt feel like just a sex thing with the other guy, we were friends before anything happened and when we started hooking up, we would stay up until 6am just talking. Both men are around the same age but my boyfriend is much more immature. This other guy is more settled and probably more realistic about the age difference.
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 9 years ago.
Hello qwerty,

You can't base your reasons on whether or not he loves you, but whether or not you love him. He can be there for you but if you don't love him, then you are not only being unfair to yourself, you are being unfair to him. Although the other guy is more realistic about the age difference, you have to decide whether or not you're looking for a relationship or someone who may not be interested in that, or may still be involved with someone else. Think about what would make you happy, or what you need at this time and that should give you a good idea of which direction to go in. I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more