Have Relationship Questions? Ask a Counselor for Answers ASAP
Though it was me that helped you before can I ask you a few more questions?
-What was your relationship with your father like?
-What type of man was your father?
-How did he treat your mother and yourself?
-Were you ever married before and if so, what type of marriage was it good or bad?
First may I say you should think about changing to another counselor if she tells you not to date even though she knows that you get lonely that isn't very good advice to tell you that all cops are bad and not to date she or he (the counselor) seems like a very negative energy. Your father does have a lot of bearing on how you view relationships and this may be why you choose such bad men you are trying to find in them what you had in your father and you may also think that this is all you deserve but it isn't what you deserve or need in your life. You really need to find a more positive counselor and ask them to help you through the issues you had with your father because once you can work through those issues with your father and his control issues and drinking this may help you to better see when the problem (bad men) is coming and choose better for yourself and realize that you are worth a good man, there are good and bad cops and for that counselor to tell you that all cops are bad that isn't a true statement for a professional to say to their patient. That counselor seems to be wasting your money you should find a more reputable counselor one that helps you instead of making you feel worse. I have included some self help books and websites that may also help you because your self esteem from being with all of those bad men that treated you badly has made you feel less than worthy:
No you need someone that considers your feelings and doesn't only think about his all the time like you said the only time he is nice to you is when he wants something from you, you want someone romantic that doesn't just want to sleep with you every time they are near you like you said the last time that when your around him he can not keep his hands off of you, you need someone that will make you feel special during intimacy so that you know you mean the world to them. Unless he is willing to change which it sounds like he is set in his ways then you don't need someone that makes you feel bad about yourself or who makes you question your self worth, you really need someone that helps you know that you are worth being treated well and respected no matter how you wear your hair or what clothes you wear but also you have to know your self worth also in order to see when a good man comes your way and stop being attracted to bad boys because they aren't very much of a man if they don't know by now how to treat a woman they are suppose to care about.
Only read the ones that you think will help you don't read them all and yes I think it would be in your best interest to find another counselor that can better help you to understand WHY you choose these men and doesn't just tell you not to date anyone. Just check out the websites I sent you and if some of them catch your eye and sound like something that will benefit you then read them. I do think he has verbal abuse tendencies but physically I doubt he would be able and if he wants a submissive woman tell him that you are not the woman for him then and then next time you stick up for yourself and he hangs up on leave it go at that and move on or tell him you don't think he is the man for you. Don't think that you won't find someone else because you will but try to make it after you figure out why you choose the wrong men for you. If it takes dating several men then take your time and do that just to see which one is best for you and then make your decision.