How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Ms Chase Your Own Question
Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Ms Chase is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

Hello, My name isXXXXX and i have been dowsing for ...

This answer was rated:

Hello, My name isXXXXX and i have been dowsing for over a month know. I am also intuned to do Spiritual healing (Reiki) as my auntie is a reiki master.

I split with my boyfriend Mikey 3 months ago, and as this was my first true love iv done everything to get him back. Nothing so far as worked.

So i used my dowser to answer some questions i had about me and Mikey. Now i asked the questions in a perfect understandable manor. I asked if i would get back with him soon, it answered "yes" i asked it the month, starting from Januarary i worked up til i got July. I did the same thing with the date. For this i got 19th.

Anyway its kind of made me warey, so i went and asked my auntie to use her dowser and asked the same questions, the same answers i got. So she used the dowser that had been blessed for her, yet the same answers.

Now im very spiritual, but also have an open mind. So i went to visit the gypsy in my town to see what she could tell me. She brought up Mikey, but would put him as my ex, she still called him my partner, even tho i told her we wasnt together. She said there was a 3rd person involved in our relationship, which there was. Mikey was seeing this lad afta we split. She told me Mikey still loved me and did not see me as his ex but his partner still, and this 3rd person wasnt sticking around for Mikey.

3weeks after i seen her, this lad mikey was seeing moved to oxford. Now i keeping an open mind still, i got my auntie to do my Fairy cards, the 3 cards i drew were spot on accurate with the situation and me. How im trying to push myself to go with my instinct, follow my heart and mind and be truthful to myself.

The next day i had my tarrot cards read by my friends mother who deals with tarrot. She did me the "tree of life". Yet again everything was spot on with what was going on in my life, what i wanted, and what was going to happen. The Tarrot cards also intwinded somehow with what my fairy cards said.

She said it was destany that me and mikey were going to get back together, but to keep an open mind about the 19th. The 19th had come and i was getting more nervous then anything, id been sick 3 times thinking about it. On the night i was in the night club which we all go to because its the only gay club in our town, and i waited for 11pm as thats the time me and mikey would start talking again. 12pm no sign of mikey, no sign of him at all, i left at 5am and he hadnt shown.

So the next day i asked my dowser if it had given me faulse answers to my questions about me and mikey, it responded with "No", so i hovered it over a picture i have a mikey and asked if this was the lad i was getting back with. And it said "Yes" so i was really confused and a little upset because even tho i tried not to i got my hopes up.

Now iv asked my doswer, well both my dowsers, the same questions i asked before. but this time iv gotten "19th, October, 2008".

If thats so, then thats the same date i met mikey for the 1st time. But why did it give me a faulse date to start off with?

Thank you for your time.

Daniel Zak Roberts
Hello Daniel,

Dowsing, Tarot, etc are not tools that should be used to accurately predict the future. I have been reading tarot for over 20 years, I dows as well, and I am an empath. I constantly have to explain to clients that this is not an answer to your future, but a direction. You can ask dates, but there should never be a condition of certainty, as anything could happen in your life or others lives that could change the situation. Dowsing for yourself can be tricky as well, especially when your desire is strong, it could cause the dows to basically 'agree' with how you are feeling. Since you've only been doing it for a month, I would practice a lot more before I would totally trust the responses you are getting. Practice on yourself, and practice on others, but not expecting to get exact/specific answers. Tarot is a guide, not an instruction manual, same with dowsing. Anyone involved with spiritual gift will tell you, there is no guaranteed way to see the future. I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more, about this or about Mikey


Customer: replied 9 years ago.
I understand clearly what you say. Its not the fact im making myself believe the answers im getting, its the things that i have seen and heard. I love mikey to bits. Our relationship, if i was to publish it would probably be a best seller. We have had more drama in 7months then a couple could possibly have in 7 years. I did forget to mention the "Connected dreams" me and mikey have shared since we split up.

3 weeks after we split i had a dream, like any other that i was with mikey, and we was over the park. But i turned around and said to him, "Mikey i dont want you to just be my boyfriend in my dreams, i want it to be like this in reality." and he looked at me an sed "Well dan, befor i went to sleep i knew we would eventually have this conversation, but just be happy im yours in ur dreams for know".

A week befor the date we was supposed to get back together i had another dream with him to were he came up to me and said "Not long left bab. Only a week." Then the Sunday after the night we was supposed to get back together he said to me in another dream "Im sorry i didnt turn up, i didnt know if i had to. And i didnt want to get intouch because it would of upset you even more, so this is the best way to apologise."

What does all that mean? For me to be having dreams that are like, and feel as if it reality. Not like the one's some people have, this one was more like an everyday thing.
I'm not necessarily saying that you are making yourself believe this, only that your desire is very strong and can be influential. Sometimes our desire can be so strong that it can overpower any other force around us, our dreams, dowsing, cards, etc. It's obvious that this man is a strong force in your life, and in some ways may have more control over you than you should be willing to give any one person, but by the same token, you may want to see where it leads you, not based on cards or dowsing, but on it's own energy. It's possible that the dowsing itself could cause a deliberate misinterpretation if this person is not meant for you. Step back from it a bit, you're causing a lot of confusion by running to many open spiritual conduits. Sit back and take a moment to reflect. Meditate on it and ask the powers that be to bring to you that which is right for you, and be open enough to accept that. Let things take a natural course for a minute, and you might be surprised at the results. Either way, if you want to give it a week and let me know how it goes. I would even be willing to do a Tarot reading for you if you like, but not now, it would have to be at least a week, and you would have to refrain from dowsing or anything else for at least a week. I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Ok, yes i will wait a week if thats ok with you? i havent really used my dowser since tuesday.
Im keeping myself away from the gay scene were he goes, iv changed my hours at work so im not on the same shift as him.

Yes he is a very very big part of my life, and all i wish is that he would see that i am sorry for how i was in the past, and all the chances i gave him. He could at least give me a second chance. I agree with you when you say its like hes controlling me. Maybe not in everyday life, but im my dreams now its as if hes taking over what ever im dreaming about and telling me what to do.

But on the other hand im just glad hes there with me if you understand what i mean? I know your probably tired of hearing about him, but i have not yet talked to anybody about the extent of how things are going. And the advice im getting from you is in somewhat, makin me see a bit clearly but a bit at a time.

A week from now is the 2nd August?

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Would you like a picture of us? Because i heard you can tell loads from a picture.?
Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Are you here chase??
Hi Daniel,

We had a terrible storm here and I lost internet access for a few days. I apologize.

A week is fine, without using the dowser. It's also a good idea to just avoid him for now. You said you changed your work schedule? Do you work with him?

Tell me what you mean by "how you were before"? And what did you give him chanced for? Why did you split this time?

I know it's hard for you...and I don't get tired of hearing about him, i it's what I if I can help you in some way, thats whats going to make me feel like we're getting somewhere.

You can send me a picture. Email it [email protected] and put attention to Mschase. Let me know when you send it, and I will check for it.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Well it all Started wen i moved back home to Walsall from London. I was really enjoying myself there. Made loads of new friends and got to really know the place.
But i felt as if there was something back here wanting me to come home. So i went to see a gypsy and she told me i needed to come back to walsall because there is somebody waiting for me but at 1st i wont realise it.

So i moved back home, then 2 weeks after i got back i went out to The Lion (only gay club in walsall) and thats were i met Mikey.

I spent the night with him and after the club we went back to this house party. We stopped there and i was drunk, and he had already told me he really liked me and "had been waiting to meet somebody like me".
But it never clicked in my head about what i was told. So i explained to him i wasnt quit other my ex. And explained the situation bewteen me and Darren (My ex) and he was totally understanding of it and accepted it.
And the following morning when i got in the taxi to go home he told me he loved me.

Anyway we remaind friends for 2 months and he was always at my house or we was always together, we used to do stuff with each other, when he stopped at mine and i was starting to like him more.
So 1 night we was both at the lion and i thought "you know what, he likes me more then a friend and i cant keep my life on hold for Darren anymore" so i asked him out. And his face just filled with joy and we started making out.

And then like even tho i was starting to like mikey more, i could not get Darren out my head. He was constantly on my mind, and i dont know why i could let him go because he bascially ruined 3years of my life. So when ever i would be chatting to Darren online it would get on mikeys nervs, and i could see it. But i carried on doing it. Its as if Darren had a tight grip on me.

Then one day i told Darren to keep out my life and that i wanted to live my life with Mikey. He wasnt happy and he kept threatening he was going to come back from spain and hurt mikey and me. So i couldnt get rid of him.

So then the lies off Mikey would start. He would lie to me about the most stupidest things like going out, and telling me he was at home. Or being at work and he had gone some out somewhere with his mates. So then i would keep ending it with him. And he would cry to me apologising and saying he wouldnt do it again so i kept having him back.

Whilest we was together we have had 3 majour fights, the first was on my Birthday, mainly because he had ruined my suprise party my dad had done for me, and when we went out he told everyone i was ungreatful towards him and i wasnt, then he made out with one of my mates.
The second was Valentines Day, i didnt want him spending any money on me so i said we would go to bingo because its free for new beginners, but that was just to cover up what i had planned for him. So when we started arguing and had a fight when we got back to mine.

Then the night after he booked an hotel room and took me there to apologise and i didnt feel well anyway so i wanted to go home, and then he kicked off and started throwing me around the room so i started fighting back. But we made up after we both calmed down and it ended up a really nice night.

But everytime he lied to me or would wind me up, i would be so petty to use Darren against him. But mikey was good at making people think it was me who was the nasty one. Because he used to be nasty to me on the sly. So i used to snap back and people just saw me retaliate.

So i never really told mikey how i really felt about him. I kept him from him because of my bad past with Darren i didnt want to go through all that again. One night tho coming back from the lion, we was walking home. And i had told one of my mates about how i was a witness to this crime, and had to give a statement to the police, and because nobody was focused on Mikey he didnt like it so he butted in and was going on about how the police raided the lion once and he had to give a statement to why 17yrs should be allowed to go into the lion.

So i pulled him up about it walking home, and asked why he always had to try and be one better then me. So we ended up arguing. Thats when i really pured my heart out to him. He had pushed me in the road so i jsut snapped back and pushed him and he went falling down this hill into a thorn bush. And i just froze and we was calling me all these horrible things so i chased after him constantly apologising, screaming at him telling him how id lied to him when i said i didnt love him and told he the intire truth.

And he threw me to the floor and told me to go home befor he got the police on me. So i walked all the way home crying covered in blood because id been screaming that much my nose was bleeding. And all he could do was phone me and throw nasty comments down the phone to me "You know what it feels like now dont ya" ect ect.

So then we sorted everything then a week later he told me he was going to bed, so i said ok babe, see you tomorrow. Then i found out that he had gone out, with another one of my friends, and told a lad who knew me, because he asked were i was. Mikey said we had split up and he was on a date with my friend.

Now i blame my self for everything that has happend. Because mikey was nothing but an absolute angle to me. If i needed anything hed get it, if i wanted to go for a walk at 3am in the morning, he would meet me to make sure i was ok and so we could alone. If i was ill, he would phone in sick at work just to come to mine and look after me. I never got any of that when i was with Darren. But yet i still treated Mikey like dirt. Not saying i was always the problem. Most our arguements was because of him being stupid and lieing about stupid things. But all Mikey wanted was for me to show i loved him more, and because of my own insucurites i couldnt drop my barriers.

But since we have split up it made me really ill. i dropped to 6 half stone from 14 in a week, i refused to see anybody, id proabably leave him 100 txts and missed calls a day. He did say to my mom he just wanted some time alone, but because id realised how much he meant to me i just wanted to give him everything he wanted from me. So i kept hounding him and hounding him.

I really want him back. I know it sounds pathetic but i love him to absolute bits. Iv never ever felt like this about anybody before. Not even Darren.

Iv sent you a picture, Titled me and Mikey. Mikeys the one with the white tie on. Theres some thing else i can tell you aswell but ill leave that til i next reply.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Iv sent the picture but i got a reply saying that it went to customer services or something, is there any other address i can send it to?
I did recieve the pic :) , and I will post back to you once I get to look it over more closely.

I read what you wrote, and you have to remember that no one can fall "in love" after only knowing someone for a night, a weekend or even a few months. Love doesn't happen that fast. In that short a period of time, the only thing you can love is what you see, because you really don't know anything about that person yet.

I think that when you first meet someone you are attracted to, you become "infatuated" with them. This is the beginning, immature phase of "real love". You wonder about their thoughts, feelings, doings, family, past, etc. We think about them all the time and we want to interact with them as much as possible. During this time it is not uncommon to want to spend every waking moment with this person, talk on the phone for hours on end, and feel like you have everything in common with them. They are exactly like you, you like all the same things, everything they do has the potential to make you happy.

Infatuation is really about self gratification, it is not a giving love.

After a while these feelings of infatuation may start to wear off, as you get to know the person better and are confronted with their flaws and inadequacies you may start to feel that maybe you don't have as much in common as you thought.

This is where the possibility of real love can come in. When you can face your mates flaws and inadequacies, and still love them in spite of, and sometimes even for it!

However "real love" goes even deeper than that. Real love means being yourself, in all of your glory, good and/or bad and feeling confident that this person will accept you regardless. Real love is knowing you can trust this person and that they can trust you, and although it is possible to hurt one another it is avoided at all cost. Sharing, understanding and communication are a part of your daily life while childish fantasy or unreasonable expectations are let go. Real love gives you a feeling of security and safety. It is based on mutual respect, mutual admiration, and a real concern for the other's well being.

It is said that the person who "infatuates" us, is the last thing that we consciously want. We are infatuated with our "Imago", an unconscious image of the person our childhood programmed us to become infatuated with.

We actually become infatuated with people who have some of the traits that we wouldn't like to find in ourselves. For example, when we tell someone "you're just like my father/mother" we are saying we see the traits that we don't want to admit we may have inherited. When we choose those traits in a mate, we can feel whole without having to take responsibility for that aspect of ourselves. We are not in love with that person, we are in love with the missing part of ourselves.

Real love on the other hand allows for stands the test of time, it withstands hardship, it sticks around.

I don't believe it's possible to know if what you share with someone is "real love" until you have spent time with them, gone through life changes with them, shared and cared and hurt with them. Knowing that there will be pain and challenges and still exhibiting a willingness to love...despite.

Let me know your thoughts, and we'll talk more.

Ms Chase and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Hi chase, im actually finding hard to understand that last reply, to a limit i can see were your coming from about the infatuation. Thats what i told mikey when he told me he had fallen inlove with me.

You can keep the picture i have it printed out anyway. I see can honest say, im inlove with mikey. I know you'v just explained it all to me.

But i know im my heart i am.

I do like talking about all this with you tho. Its them 1st time iv felt able to open up to someone. And its wierd because i dont even know you, yet i can express how im feeling towards mikey and what i really want with him, yet i cant do this to my friends or my parents.

Are you still up for doing a card reading for me on the 2nd?

When i get home i will send you an email explaining a few things that have happend to me as well. In my dreams.

Thank you for all your help and i hope theres more to come soon.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Hi, well as i said in my last reply, iv had 3 connected dreams with Mikey. And i researched them and its very rare for 2 people to have a connected dream. Basically were they have unfinished buisness that they cant talk about in reality, so find it easier to do in dreams. And iv had 3 with Mikey.

The 1st was when we 1st split up and we was sitting outside the McDonalds near us and i we were together and i turned around and said to him "Mikey i dont want you to just be my boyfriend in my dreams i want it to be in real life as well"
And he turned around and said "baby, just enjoy us being together in our dreams. At the moment anyway."

And it didnt feel like a dream, it felt as if it was just another day, and we ended it going to bed with each other and i woke up.

2nd time was a week befor my we was supposed to of been getting together. the date my dowser gave me. And he grabbed me and kissed me and said "Not long to go know baby, then ill have u back. Can you wear the top i brought you"

and the 3rd dream was the night after we was supposed to be getting back together, and he came to my house in my dream "And apologised for not coming to The Lion, because he didnt know if he had to go or not because noone invited him."

So its kinder freaked me a little, for us to have full on conversations in our dreams, and us both knowing that were dreaming.

You know the tarrot reading your doing for me tomorrow? will i have to be online, because i wont be online i dont think because i got work all night. Or will you be able to use the picture i sent you? By the way, what can you work out from the picture?

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Chase are you there??

I got your last response this morning, we've been experiencing some email issues with the site, so I apologize for not getting back to you. I'm glad that you feel comfortable talking to you and that I am able to be here for you to talk to. Can you update me real quick about whats going on with you, and with mikey?

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Hello chase, Well so far nothing major i dont think, but saturday night at work he was doing an awfull lot of things to get my attention.

When he was doing a basket run on checkouts he kept wlkin past my isle and whisling, he then stud with one of the supervisors at the bottom of my isle but moved from infront of her so he was looking directly up my isle.

The he carried a table past the quickest doors to the staff room to the second door which was near me.

The he got nearer my isle and just kept walking past me.

I dont know if i sound paranoid or if he was trying to get my attention. Anyway did you manage to do that Tarrot reading for me? And what could you tell from the picture of me and him?

I got told by a friend on Thursday that Mikey adn the lad he cheated on me with have split up. Know me and my other friend were trying to wounder why they had split, but she personaly thinks its because Mikeys been talking about me to this lad, and hes had enough. I havnt given mikey any attention for at least a month know. I do kind of feel that im attacting him back but only slightly.

I get payed on the 15th of this month and iv planned to send a suprise to him at the store. Nothing major just a bunch of flowers, and a poem that the lady said she would read to him for me. Is that a good idea? I really want him back in my life, an i think if one of us doesnt make a move then it will never happen.

Iv also been chatting to this astrol phsyic. Shes sent my a full reading of my astrol skies and said that she personaly feels a strong connection with me. And that my life if going to drasticly change within 88days. If you would like a copy of whats shes writen ill be happy to send it you??

But theres something else chase. Its the number 8. Im seeing it quite frequantly. 88days, have known mikey 8 months now, hes 18, i planned to send the flowers on the 18th (This was before i emailed this phsyic. If you count the alphabet the letter M is the 15th number, but, it lands on the 8th finger. And when i told you about the dowser giving me a wrong date to when me and mikey were supposed to get back together, the next date it gave me was the 18th of October. Do you think theres a connection?

I have missed talking with you, i do really want everything to work out with me and mikey, resulting in us getting back together. If you already did my tarrot reading what did you get? and what can you tell from our picture? And if you do want to see what the astrol reading says please feel free to ask.

Nice to hear from you again.

Daniel Zak
Hi Daniel,

Have you talked to him at all or is it just the trying to get noticed?

Yes, you can send me a copy the same way you sent the picture. I will do a three card spread tomorrow and post back with what I find, as well as my thoughts on the photo.


Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Thank you chase, No i havnt talked to him yet. The flowers will be the 1st thing iv done to him for a month and half now.

So lets see how that goes.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Hello Daniel,

As you may or may not know they've been doing upgrades to th site, trying to imporve speed, improve user ability, etc. Consequently I haven't been getting some of my emails and I did not see your last response.

Please tell me, how did the flowers go? Have you spoken to him at all?

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
I didnt send the flowers!, On thursday we was out at the club and was having a good chat outside with our mates. Just having a laugh with each other. this went on for about 2 hours or just calm relaxed feelings with me and him.

Then i asked him if he would come talk to me, so we went to a bench in the garden, and i asked him if he hated me and he said no, he cant hate me he doesnt hate anyone. So i said thank you.

The he startred going on about this poem id sent him. Saying i must of copied it from somewhere or i got someone to do it for me, an i told him i hadnt i did it myself. It took me 4 days to put together. And he woudlnt believe me because the spelling was brilliant. so i laughted about it.

And i knew what he was trying to do, wind me up so id snap and show myself up infront of everybody. But i stayed calm. Then he turned nasty on me saying loads of really hurtful things, but still i remand calm. and just laughed it off. And he didnt like it.

So he went off and i stayed outside for 15 minutes to calm down. Then i went back into the club, and i was talking to one of our mates. And he came off the dance floor and put his arm around me. And i was thinking "What the f**k?" but then we all went home and isaid bye to them all.

On the saturday as soon as i got into the club my mate came up to me and said mikey as been slagging you off rotten to everyone. So i turned around and said what a suprise.

I walked into the lounge and he was there with 3 old men, and he was blantenly trying to get me jealous!! But i just turned away and me and my mate was laughing about it. Anyway these 3 men were goin and the one gave mikey a hug, and mikey pulled him back into the toilets. I didnt see this. My mate said come on lets go to the toilet so i went with him, and mikey was in there with this old man. But its as if mikey had realised he had done a mistake, because this old man was saying "You better text me, your really nice you are" and mikey was like nervous and trying to get away from him.

So when he went i turned to my mate and said, see he's tried making me jealous and its back fired on him.

I really wanted to help him out, but he got himself into it being a jerk so he can get himself out of it. Anyway outside he came other to me and my mate and was standing there, and i turned to him and said, in a nice way "Was you ok at work? you looked a little upset" and he said ye i was, its called boredem.

So i put my hand up to him and carried on talking to my mate. The about 3am i went other to sit with my other friend because i hadnt seen him all night, and mikey was acting like a twat. He kept saying to my mate. I want him back haha! I do! I really want him back! and then laughing. Then he started singing Take Thats song "I want you back" but changing the words, trying to make everybody laugh around him and me.

But i just lost it, and i called him a f**kin prick and threw my drink over him and he shut up. And every1 that was around him walked off laughing. So i said to my mate "See, theres his friends, they dont want to know him unless he's bad mouthing me"

The he told this women he was going home before it all kicked off! and i adnt seen him again til Monday at work. He tried getting my attention again but i ignored him until he finished his shift, And yesterday when i went in to meet my mate, another one of my friends said "i watched mikey watch you. As soon as you walked threw the doors he watched you walk up the isle past his til and into the toilets. The he started talking louder".

I said hes pathetic. HE DOESNT like it becuase im not giving him the attention he wants. So hes giving me the attention to get it off me.
It sounds like you are right about that. He's acting very childish. I think you'll find that if you keep on the way you're going he'll either be eating out of your hand or he'll really just go nuts. It sounds like he does want to be with you, he may just be afraid of what will happen if he were to make the commitment especially with what all happened before.

I did a three fates Tarot spread for you with a lovecraft deck, and came up with a few things. Your past card, Two of Sites, shows me that you had a change of circumstances in your recent past, either a move to a new location or a change in circumstances. Either way you felt like you were taking one step forward and two steps back, but you made a definite change for the better. Your second card, which is your present card, shows me Shoggoth, which is raw power. You're experiencing a surge of power right now, something that you may not have knowns you had. Play the cool, calm and collected one, and you will get better results. You are in top health and physical fortitude and may now be feeling a surge of tremendous force. Victory over/after apprehension and fear, and a more solid standing....your ability to face and overcome opposition brings the inner qualities of strength and forbearance. Delays and setbacks will be overcome. Your last card, the right card, is your future. This card represents a critical element of your future.....this card is the crawling chaos, and it stands for completeness, a job well done.....achievement, reward, and well-earned recognition. This will be a time of success, prosperity, security and joy for you, and it may also indicate travel or a change in residence.

That was a pretty good reading actually, better than most of the ones I've been getting. Again, like I said, you seem to be on the right track, keep a cool head and see how it goes over the next week or two. I'm here if you need to talk.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
<p>Hey chase,</p><p> </p><p>Thank you so much for doing my 3 spread cards =]. Ye that pretty much sounds ok for me. The 1st card i can totally relate to because i moved to London didnt i.</p><p> </p><p>On Tuesday i went into Sainsburys because i was meeting my friend to go to this spiritual circle, and my other mate Kev was in there and i hadnt realised, so when i came out of ther customer toilets i saw him and went and stud with him in the que.</p><p> </p><p>And he said, i saw you walk in then i looked straight at mikey, and i watched him watch you as soon as you walked threw the doors all the way up to the toilets. The because you hadnt seen him he started talking a bit louder to this customer.</p><p> </p><p>Chase im proud of myself because im not giving him attention, if i see him out yes i will speak to him, but when he tries to show me up infront of people i just laugh along with it because it gets to him that im not bothered what he says.</p><p> </p><p>Like my mates jaime, shes great, only known her a few weeks. But like she said, he obviously still as feelings for me else he wouldnt constuantly slag me off to everybody, talk about me to my mates. And keep trying to wind me up. If he didnt want to know me anymore he wouldnt even do any of that.</p><p> </p><p>And i was like omg your right.</p><p> </p><p>I cant believe how much im love him tho chase, im kind of loving the attention he's giving me to get some off me if that makes sence, but im making him work for it now.</p><p> </p><p>Did you see anything with the picture i sent you of him??</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for all your help and i hope it will carry on.</p><p> </p><p>Daniel</p>
Oh yes, the pic. Cute picture....he's a bit spoiled isn't he? self assured at least on the outside. He wants your approval....but not sure he wants you to know it yet. willing to give of himself and his heart, yet wants to be the're very sweet person, but you've got to stand up for yourself're an open book for those who would care to read.....there's a definite connection between the two of you, but its going to take both sides to give and take.

I'm here anytime you want to talk.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
<p>Hey chase,</p><p> </p><p>Yes hes very spoiled. He seeks attention from anybody. He likes being center of attention. What does he want my approval on? I dont mind if he wants to be the domanant figure in the relationship, as iv always been the "Women figure" in any relationship iv had so im used to it.</p><p> </p><p>Yes, after we split up everyone was saying how we made a lovely looking couple, and how sweet we were together.</p><p> </p><p>I can connect with standing up for myself more. I hate confrontations. I normally back away from arguments and fights.</p><p> </p><p>I went to see our gypsy in my town on friday. She said that me and him would get back together, but it wont last because he isnt going to change, he as mixed up feelings about me. But is a good person, hes not a bad person. And i agreed. Because deep inside him is a loving and caring Mikey.</p><p> </p><p>But all i want to know is when we will be getting back together? Can you tell when we will Chase??</p><p>And as the gypsy told me it wont be a long relationship, now i know this is it possible i can change the outcome?</p><p> </p><p>After i told her about the lion incodent, and me throwing my drink over him, she told me we would talk again, we would bump into each other.</p><p>Can you tell when this is goin to happen? And if you can see when we get back together??</p><p> </p><p>Daniel</p>
Hi Daniel,

I don't think it matter who a person is, I don't believe people can tell you a yes/no answer on a situation. People can see 'towards' a situation but as for knowing for sure, I don't believe that is possible, because our futures can change at a moments notice. The reason i love Tarot so much is that it won't give you a definitive answer, as it can't, but it will give you a view of the situation and point out choices.

I pulled one card on a Rider Waite deck to ask about the situation with you and Mikey. It came up, the Four of Cups. This tells me that you do have love and devotion around you, only that you may be looking for it in the wrong place. You may have an unknown admirer/s that are looking at you from afar. You may even have someone that you know likes you, but you are taking them for granted. Instead of looking where you can have a sure thing, you are looking for the indefinable. You've been feeling a little cut off from the world and what you desire, but this apathy is causing you to lose out on other opportunities.

I can't tell you how this fits into your life, or even if it refers to Mikey. The cards speak to the issue, and you have to take it in and find it's applicable place.


ps don't forget to click the green accept button if I've been helpful, as thats the only way I get credit for my work with you.
Customer: replied 9 years ago.
<p>Heylo chase,</p><p> </p><p>Yes i will click accept when i get payed. At the moment im over drawn with my bank and i wont get payed til the 12th of next month. So then ill b able to pay you for your help and hope your help carrys on?</p><p> </p><p>I really enjoyed reading the responce i got from you about the picture, it was so wierd that from that you can tell he's spoiled and being self assured. </p><p> </p><p>What does that mean actually? And what/why is he waiting my approval of?, I dont mind if he wants to be the boss. Im better in myself if someone else is more the "Male" figure in a relationship anyway.</p><p> </p><p>Could you tell anything else from the picture?</p><p> </p><p>Daniel Zak</p>
Thats fine Daniel, and we can talk as long as you like. Self assurred could mean he's concieted, very sure of himself, maybe arrogant at times, not shy about himself. Not sure about the approval, but he definitly wants you to notice him, and give him attention.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
<p>Ahhh yes he defently wants me to keep noticing hes there. Im still amazed at how accurate you got his personality! The approval thing still plays on my mind but the rest was brilliant.</p><p> </p><p>I was put on the far til at work today. Because im not allowed near him, which is good for me i guess because im not giving him attention if im close. </p><p>But i turn around and look up the isle facing my till and Mikeys there, stocking the shelvs. Not doing it discreetly, but trying to make him self known hes there if u get me?</p><p> </p><p>The check outs manager was there aswell, and mikey was had raised his voice a little just so i could hear him, but i didnt give any attention. Some customers i served asked me why i was up the far end on my own and i explained i wasnt allowed near him, and explained he was my ex to them. And the amount of comments i got off some of the customers about him, how immature he acts, and self obsessed.</p><p> </p><p>I said yes thats him, but i was being careful of what i said, because i havnt once said a bad word towards mikey to anybody. So i defently wasnt going to start now.</p><p> </p><p>I had a chat with my friend Caz, who i work with but also went to school with. And told her about how he's always slagging me off and bad mouthing me to anybody and everybody he can. And like i said to you in a previous email i think, when i threw my drink over him. The amount of people that do not like him in the lion. Even shaun, (the bar managers bf) said he wasnt the most popular person that goes in there.</p><p> </p><p>See Mikey is trying to turn everybody against me, but its back firing and everybody is hating him because the way he keeps bad mouthing me and because hes constuantly in peoples faces, and everyone is sick of it. A comment of 4 people, "He's really boring. When he talks to you, your trying not to yawn"</p><p> </p><p>See when i 1st meet someone new boy or girl, i know how long you stay around for. You introduce yaself, av a small chat && a laugh then say your chat after. Saves either of you feeling awkward and bored. But with mikey he will stay there the ages chatting on about stuff that isnt relevant. And if he see's there getting bored then he uses me as a back up to keep them interested.</p><p> </p><p>If i send you another picture Chase, of just him will you see what you can work out from his 1?</p><p> </p><p>Daniel Zak</p>
Well be careful not to lose your job over this. I did get the picture, but I still get a sense of selfishness from him. He's very stubborn and self absorbed....but a lot of young men are at this age, so it's not necessarily uncommon. I would suggest to continue as you are at this time, basically ignoring him, and not really talking about him to others. The fact that he doesn't know when people are losing interest in the conversation demonstrates how immature he is. It's possible that you can show him/teach him how to be more mature over time. Approval meaning that he wants you to approve of him, to agree with him in a sense, but he's not getting that and its why he's now acting out.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
<p>hey chase,</p><p> </p><p>I really want mikey back so much <img src="/tinymce/jscripts/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-cry.gif" border="0" alt="Cry" title="Cry" width="18" height="18" /></p>
Aww sweetie. How have things been going? Is he still acting like a jerk? Have you seen him? Talked to him?

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
I dunno how things are going anymore, i see him at work, but he doesnt talk to me, yet trys to keep my attention.

My friend phoned me while i was at work yesterday and i was on about this lad that i met on saturday at the club, and was talking about how he kept kissing me and took me home.

And i didnt realise Mikey was in the locker room with me and when i turned around he was just stareing at me. And then he went rushing out the locker room as if he was in a mood.

Then the end of the night he walked down the isle which was near my till pretending to be on the phone to someone.

I just wish he would just talk to me because hes driving me insane
Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Hey Chase,

you ok? Im pretty f**ked off (sorry about the laungage). Yet another Saturday night ruined.

Went to the lion, was having a wicked time til about 10:30, then Maggie (Mikeys & my mate) called me over and said "Michaels coming out so please no arguing, fighting ect ect" so i said yeah fair enough i cant be arsed anyway.

Anyway he turned up and i was polite to him, i smiled and waved and he waved back. Now all night, we was getting along if someone gave me a ciggerette he would get his lighter out quickly to light it 4 me, he even brought me a shot!

And i just enjoyed being around him, there was no tention. Even tho he was being arsy with me, and throwing stupid snide comments to me infront of people, i was just laughing it off.

He's even told people he has another boyfriend. But he's only saying it because everyone knows that iv been kind of seeing this new lad.
So im putting it down to him being jealous so he's doing anything he can to wind me up. But it wasnt working because we know he isnt seeing anyone.

About 2:30am i had 3 people come up to me and ask if "I actually accused Mikey of rape" because that is what he was telling everybody. So i lost it. I went into the club and told him to get outside because i wanted to chat.

I was screaming my head off at him, told him how much this is all making me ill, that i split up with 2 lads in the matter of 3 weeks because all i wanted was to be with him. After i said that tho, he seemed as if he was proud of himself. Told him how sorry i was that i feel inlove with him to late, and how much i was still inlove with him.

And all he kept doin was saying how sorry he was about how far this "Rape situation" had gone, Im sorry, im Sorry im sorry. thats all he kept saying. He knew it was too late for apologising because he even said " i know it dont help the situation but i really am sorry"

And i was getting more addigated. And i turned around and said "Iv been advised to get a solisiters letter sent out, because this as gone to far"

He shut up. Didnt say anything. I told him how everybody in the club and everybody at work knew about it and it was because of him. and all he kept doin was apologising to me.
Now at 1st i said i dont f**kin believe your sorry, because we both know you dont mean it. But when he was saying it all for the second time, i truely believed he was sorry, and i let myself believe he was.

I calmed down then and he was just looking at me, and i went to give him a hug, until 1 of the bouncers came round whos good mates with us anyway, and 2 other people were there and then its as if it was just a trigger for him to change. and he started being all mouthy and nasty.

I kept draggin him back because i wanted this sorted out. but he was just getting more and more nasty, til it got ot the point i just slapped him so hard around his face.

I did get asked to leave, but all night when i got home i did nothing but cry my eyes up because of what i did to him. I hated it when we used to fight when we was together, but slapping him last night killed me.

What am i supposed to do chase? hes sending me really mixed signals. He didnt have to buy me that shot, but he did. When ever i asked somebody for a light, he would be the 1st to give me one, when i wanted to talk to him he came straight over.

If he hates me as much as he says he does then he wouldnt do any of that would he?

Im still trying to work out why he needs my approval on something because that as me stumped!

Daniel Zak
Hi Daniel,

I'm sorry to hear things went so badly. I say approval because he looks up to you in some way. Whether its that you have so many friends, or people are talking well about you. Because of his jealousy he can't bring himself to admit how he feels, its a tug of war between being vulnerable or not thinking he's a man, and because so many people are around, sort of an audience, it make him lose his cool, any time he feels like he's not being given the upper hand. The fact is, he has to decide if he loves having the upper hand more than he loves being with you, if so, things will never work out, not just for you, but anyone he wants to be with.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
<p>Well, iv been to see our gypsy in town, and I mentioned him saying he had a boyfriend, but she stopped me before i carried on an said there was no lad in his life in a relationship way. So i said i didnt think there was.</p><p> </p><p>He was saying it because i was mentioning that i was kind of seeing another person.</p><p> </p><p>Iv seen him at work today, he started at half just as i finished but he turned up early. And i saw him looking up the check outs to see if he could spot me, so i ducked under the till. So when i got back up he was looking at the check out planner to see where i was, and he looked up at me before i could duck again.</p><p> </p><p>So were our back doors are to go into the back were the staff room is is the same isle where the captin pod is where he was, but instead he walked away from that isle and was coming nearer to my til then he stopped. Looked at me and went to walk up the isle, then turned around looked at me again then went to walk outside still staring at me.</p><p> </p><p>Know iv told my auntie who is the reiki master and does tarot and stuff and she said he obviously wants you back, but hes seeing how far he can push you. And i said to her, hes trying to act like my ex darren, because he knew how much darren treated me bad and i kept running back to him, so hes trying to be like him. But im not going threw al that again.</p><p> </p><p>Know when i took Mikey to her house before, she turned around to us and said, "Mikey, Daniels going to fall inlove with you and your going to end up hurting him"</p><p> </p><p>And i just laughted it off and said yeah whatever. Then 4 months down the line it happens, so i kind of believe her when she says she can see us getting back together, but im going to say no.</p><p> </p><p>But apart from that, he was trying to get my attention today at work, by looking for me and just blatenly staring at me.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
Hi dear....I think you have a good point.....he is pushing anf pulling, seing what he can get away with. Even if you do want to be with him, I wouldnt rush back into anything...take the time to get to know him as a person and who he is really...on the inside...that part he doesn't want anyone to see. I think if you believe he would be open to it, that you should ask him to lunch to clear the air, and go somewhere where you know for a fact that no one would see either of you that you knew. Make it a short lunch, but let him know you want to be friends and dont want to do all the crazy stuff anymore and see what he says.

Customer: replied 9 years ago.
<p>Chase, i dunno if you can do this but if you can it would be brilliant.</p><p>Im going out on saturday ye? and i want to know if Mikey will be out, if he is im going to take him somewhere quiet and have a really good talk with him.</p><p> </p><p>Tell him whats on my mind, what he's doin thats hurtin me and what i really want from the pair of us. </p><p> </p><p>Do you think thats a good idea? BUt can you see if it will be a a good time to do so?</p><p> </p><p>Daniel Zak </p>