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been married for 6 months husband hates my cats ...

Customer Question
been married for 6 months...
been married for 6 months husband hates my cats ...Now everything I do for my son is like a interagation.what did you give him how much .my son lives with us he is 23 just been in car accident a busted disc in his back .why he goes places if he hurt ..he needs to stay home if he''s hurt .help
Submitted: 9 years ago.Category: Relationship
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Answered in 15 minutes by:
5/11/2008
Counselor: Ms Chase, Life Coach replied 9 years ago
Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2,897
Experience: Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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Hello Sheila

How long were you together before you got married?

Did he hate your cats before you got married?

Was your son living with you before you got married?

How did you and your husband meet?

What are your ages?

Chase

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Customer reply replied 9 years ago
knew each other 6months said the cats did not bother him .yes my son lived here .and we are 45 (him)52 me .met through a friend
Counselor: Ms Chase, Life Coach replied 9 years ago

Hello Sheila,

Thank you for that additional information. So the cats bother him now, when before they didn't. Your son was living there when he met you, but now it bothers him? Is the house you live in now, your house? Why did he marry you or move in with you if this was such a problem for him? It seems he wants to control aspects of your life that he either did not have enough nerve to say before you got married, or figured now that he is your husband and the 'man of the house' that you should get rid of the things he doesn't like. This is a symptom of controlling behavior, and if you give in on these issues, there's not telling what may come next....he may not like your hair, or the house, or your friends, or the way you dress...what's next? If it's not controlling behavior, then that means he may never have liked the cats or the fact that your son lived with you, but was to afraid or insecure to tell you. Since you know him best, XXXXX XXXXX to try and figure out which one it is. If he's being controlling, you have to let him know that you love your cats and you love your son, they were there before he came and you're not interested in getting rid of them, and if he can't deal with it, then maybe you have to make other arrangements. If you're not willing to give him any type of ultimatum, then it's always going to be an issue or them or him, and you're always going to caught in the middle, so you have to decide if you want to nip it in the bud now or let it drag out more and see if it settles down. I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more

Chase

Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2,897
Experience: Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
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