How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Ms Chase Your Own Question
Ms Chase
Ms Chase, Life Coach
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2897
Experience:  Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Ms Chase is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

my husband seems like hes hiding something we dont even have

Customer Question

its been 3mos we dont have sx he always says he has to deal with himself and he seems secretive
Submitted: 9 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 9 years ago.

Hello llizzy

How long have you been married?

What are your ages?

What does he mean he has to deal with himself?

Has he ever cheated before?

Any other problems?


Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Reply to Ms Chase's Post: we,ve been married ayear today is our anniversary to my knowledge no he hasnt cheated but its feels like hes hiding something i feel like he is or is planning to i feel i cant believe what he says as far as he has to deal with himself he worries about other peoples probelms instead of his own and he uses their probelms as an excuse when i question about us
Expert:  Ms Chase replied 9 years ago.

Hello Lizzy,

If he's never cheated that you know of, then you can't accuse him of it without proof. I believe that all women have what's called 'women's intuition', and if you feel strongly that there is something wrong or that he's hiding something, then chances are he probably is. You have to question yourself, and ask yourself, are you normally a paranoid person? Are you distrustful by nature? If so, then it may just be that you are normally suspicious.

If he's using other things as an excuse when you try and talk to him, then he may be in denial. You have to let him know, even if it means writing things down and addressing them one by one, that when you discuss you and his issues that you don't want him bringing other people into it, as this is your marriage and your relationship and no one else's.

The lack of intimacy is an issue as well. Are you making 'alone' time for the two of you. A time where they two of you can be alone and not get interrupted by kids, family or friends? This alone time may not always be used for sex, but also for hugging, cuddling, talking, and generally getting to know each other better.

I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more