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Are you split?
How long were you together?
How old are the two of you?
Do you think you'll be getting back together?
Thanks you for that info
What was the verbal request, that you split up?
If he wants to split up, why is he still coming home?
Have you asked him why he is acting so loving toward you if he wants to split?
If he won't talk to you then it's very difficult to know what is going on in his head since he refuses to talk about it. One way to really get a grasp on what's going on is to stop sleeping with him. If he wants to live on his own and he doesn't want to be with you, then why should he be getting the fringe benefits? The problem is, when a man starts to pull away, it goes against our instinct to pull away back, but sometimes it's the only way that we can keep some of our self esteem intact. He knows what he's feeling and he knows whats going on, he just doesn't want to talk about it, and you deserve better than that. You've been with him for 20 years so the least he can do is be straight with you, so that you know where to go from here.
I welcome your thoughts, let me know if you want to talk more