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He is entering adolescence and he is testing the waters to see what he can get away with. I would pick your battles with him and often try not to engage with him. He want the fight so as best you can, turn your back and let him blow off his steam and find his independence. Stand your ground on the important issues of course but pick the ones where he can "win." You will both be happier for it. Not easy, and it will take some patience on your part and practice but you can do it.
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