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earthsister, Parent
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 141
Experience:  Home Child Care Provider, and mother of 4; two pre-teen boys and twin baby girls.
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I have worked in entertainment since I was a kid, behind the

Resolved Question:

I have worked in entertainment since I was a kid, behind the scenes for celebrities and producers. I have developed a tight knit relationship with many old celebrities. Sadly, I am seeing them get ill and pass from time to time.

There is one lady (lets call her Mary) that I became very close to, where she would refer to me as her 'daughter' as she had no kids of her own. She was also a paying client.

Things started to go south when her best friend, another "name" in show biz that i was very close to became ill. (lets call her Jane) I didn't like how Mary treated Jane. Mary would make jokes about slipping her poison constantly. I would laugh at it but she was serious. Jane had dementia and would ask the same questions over and over again. Mary didn't have any patience for that as she is very busy, and still a working actress. Mary got her signed off as incompetant and got control of her estate. She soon shipped her off to a nursing home in another state and stole items from her.

Jane was married to another hollywood actor many years before and had an agreement that when Jane passed that all her house and belongings belonged to her ex husband's kids. Mary didn't like Jane's ex-husband at all and felt that Jane was always a wimp in that relationship.

So Mary did all she can to spend Jane's money. Meanwhile I asked to take care of Jane and Mary said no... they said its too much to take care of her and too much a pain in the butt so it was best to ship her off to another state.

They did that and pretty much took what they felt was of value. I witnessed this and felt really badly that I had such low moral and character that i allowed her to do it.

Mary's housekeeper would put the items in my car to take to Mary's house and I didn't stop it. I was afraid of being ex-ed out of the circle of friends that I was so close to.

The following year a fight happened between Mary and me, I feel it was really because I couldn't stand to see her anymore. So I cut all ties with her. Jane died a few months later. I haven't talked to anyone of Jane's ex or her step kids since. I am so afraid as they all believe Mary is a saint (she is a good actress).

I feel like I should somehow contact Jane's ex-husband or kids and let them know but I am scared. What do I do?
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  earthsister replied 4 years ago.

earthsister :

Good morning, I would like to help you today.

earthsister :

The entertainment business can be a very messy business, I do know from experience as well. It almost sounds as though "Jane" didn't have a will; otherwise, how was her "best friend" able to take control of her money and her health? No one else had/has any input into "Janes" estate (if so, they should be contacted). I do not think that you are a "whimp"; It only seems that you were trying to help as much as you could (trying to take care of "Jane"), but stay out of the situation at the same time (legal). I do think that it would be a good idea to contact "Jane's" ex and his children, because as you mentioned, that's who she agreed to leave everything to, and I am sure that it is what she would want you to do. If you can contact them discretely and let them know the scenario, this would be best.

earthsister and other Parenting Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Hi Earthsister.
Thank you.

Jane did have a will and an estate. However, deeming her incompetant by knowing her doctors and lawyers (I have to tell you that any celebrity that has a name gets away with murder and no one asks questions. This celebrity has a good way of 'acting') However, two people got control over her assets but the will was irrevocable if i understand it correctly and her ex and his kids were pre-promised the house and assets. This didn't sit with her well as she doesn't like them.

The problem is if i get involved using my name, then I can be drug into a big thing and I have already problems going on that are taking up most of my time. Also I am really afraid of retaliation. People stand behind celebrities without knowing because they like to be close to fame so I would have many people angry with me. Also since I worked for this lady she has all my information and can probably retaliate.

What if i sent an anonymous letter? So you do think I should contact the others? I waited two years now, she died about 1 and a half years ago mostly because I wanted to make sure i did the right thing, but im also scared.

Expert:  earthsister replied 4 years ago.
I can certainly understand why you say that you are concerned, and scared, and I certainly would not recommend doing anything that could put you in possible danger. I do not know how well, or if you knew this ex-husband and his children at all, but if you do know them in any way, and feel that you can trust them, letting them know what you know would be my suggestion. If you feel that some how they will reveal to the public who gave them this information, definitely send an anonymous letter. It may even be a good idea to contact a lawyer to get further advice on the best way to handle the situation from here. I do hope that everything works out well; if you do need any further ideas or advice, please message for me, I will be more than happy to help. "earthsister."